Silly Joke Friday

Silly Joke #1

The Child’s Bedtime Prayer said by a much older adult…

Now I lay me
Down to sleep.
I pray the Lord
My shape to keep.
Please no wrinkles
Please no bags
And please lift my backside
Before it sags.
Please no age spots
Please no gray
And as for my belly,
Please take it away.
Please keep me healthy
Please keep me young,
And thank you Dear Lord
For all that you’ve done.
Amen

Silly Joke #2

A family was having guests to dinner. At the table, the mother turned to her six-year-old daughter and says, “Dear, would you like to say the blessing?”

“I wouldn’t know what to say,” replies the little girl.

“Just say what you usually hear Mommy say, sweetie…”

Her daughter takes a deep breath, bows her head, and solemnly says, “Dear Lord, why the hell did I invite all these people to dinner?”

Silly Joke #3

After praying nonstop for eight years, God decides to grant a faithful man answers to three prayers.

“I pray to have the coolest car in the world.” the man says to God.

“Done.” Suddenly a McLauren F1 appeared in front of him and a title registered in his name.

“I pray for a home that is the most luxurious mansion in the world.” the said excitedly while staring at his new multi-million dollar vehicle.

“Done.” Suddenly he found himself standing in front of The Spelling Manor in Beverly Hills, a 56,000 square foot home, with the deed to it now in his hands.

“And lastly, I pray for the most loyal and faithful woman in the world.”

“Done.” Suddenly Mother Theresa appeared.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson