TLC has another new show that seems to be creating a tremendous amount of uproar from various people and groups around the country. It’s called “My Husband’s Not Gay” and is based on four Mormon men living in Salt Lake City, Utah, who are each married to a woman, but attracted to men, yet they don’t identify themselves as gay.
As of the time of me writing this, the GLAAD organization has been one of the most outspoken stating, “the show is downright irresponsible.” And that “No one can change who they love, and, more importantly, no one should have to. A Change.org petition was also started specifically to ask TLC to cancel the show and has already garnered over 80,000 signatures. Over on TLC’s main web page for the show itself, there’s now a growing amount of debates, anger, and rage being written in the comments section for those in support of the show and those who aren’t.
Sadly, after reading enough of those comments and enough of the news articles about this new show, I found the issue is really no different than what been an ever-increasing hot topic for the past decade or so. And it boils down to just one thing and one thing only…
Team A: Homosexuality is a sin and a choice.
Team B: Homosexuality is not a sin and a person is born that way.
With that being said, the show “My Husband’s Not Gay” now joins the ranks of those who have kept this debate alive such as Duck Dynasty, Chick-Fil-A, The Salvation Army, and the Boy Scouts of America, each having previously stood on the foundation that begin gay is morally wrong, all the while using the Bible’s words as their platform.
Frankly, I’ve grown quite weary of this issue and of the hate coming from both sides of the debate. Some of the comments I read were downright vicious and polarizing from those who support homosexuality and those who don’t. But the reality is to each his own. So what if a bunch of guys have chosen to be married, but still have feelings towards men? I’ve met a ton of them in my lifetime already. Some have cheated on their wives repeatedly behind their backs with other men for years. Others have remained faithful but miserable inside because they have never felt like they were being true to themselves. While a bunch have lived in complete denial for years about the entire issue. But most seemed to have lived in fear for much of their married life, fully believing that God says homosexuality is a sin.
Look, I’m not God and can’t say how God truly feels on this issue. I also can’t say whether the Bible is God’s absolute truth or not and neither can anyone else on this Earth either. The fact is that each person has their own walk in life and whether they choose to remain married and faithful with gay feelings, or to act on them and commit adultery, or to live fully as a homosexual, is really all about their own journey with God.
I’ve had my own journey with God in terms of my sexuality and come to acceptance over it. It took me more than two decades to get there, but I have an incredible amount of peace and serenity now when it comes to my sexuality. Unfortunately, there are plenty out there in this world like the four men in this new TLC show who still battle what they probably refer to as their inner demon.
While I don’t know whether this show will be successful or not, it’s already fully successful in one thing, and that’s in showing the continued separation of our country between those who believe God looks down upon homosexuality and those who don’t. Until everyone comes to a place of unconditional love and acceptance in their hearts about a person’s sexuality, a show like “My Husband’s Not Gay” is only going to keep on sparking outrage and further drive us away from receiving the absolute love of God himself…
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
Everyone is on their own journey. Well said !!
Thanks Dex! Glad you read the article. 🙂
I’d gently suggest that TLC is airing this for one reason, and one reason only. It’s not because they support the Mormon Church, or they believe the Mormons’ stand on homosexuality is right. In the end, it’s the controversy itself that they are going for – because their primary goal is not to tell the truth or champion a cause, but to drive Web traffic.
As such, it fits right in with “19 Kids and Counting,” “Jon & Kate Plus 8,” and other gems like the polygamy masterpiece “Sister Wives.” As such, TLC is right up there with every other tabloid TV show – they don’t care whether it’s true, or right, or proper. To me, getting upset at “My Husband’s Not Gay” is like getting upset at a baby filling its diaper. It’s what they both do, and the quality is almost identical.
Conservative religion has been demanding that people “act straight” forever and ever. John McNeill and the Catholics, Chris Glaser and the Presbyterians, Ray Boltz, Mel White and so many others in the evangelical church – they all have been persecuted for their sexuality and their faith. Until it gets bad enough, the bindings of religion hold tight. Ray Boltz (who wrote the iconic Christian song “Thank You”) came out at 55, after 33 years of marriage and 20 years of Christian music ministry. It was much the same for me – denial was my modus operandi until I couldn’t deny the truth any longer, at 48 (and 13 years of active sobriety).
If you really want to see the true “other side” of the Mormons-and-gays issue, the writings of Carol Lynn Pearson are astonishing. Her book Goodbye, I Love You is her true story as a wife, her life with her gay (and, eventually, HIV-positive) husband, and how she cared for him as he came home to her, to die of the disease. Her powerful follow-up to that story is No More Goodbyes: Circling The Wagons Around Our Gay Loved Ones, her twenty-year history of working within the Mormon church to welcome and care for GLBT folks, and to change attitudes within the church.
As long as there is outrage about TLC’s programming, it really seems like they are the ones who win. TLC (which used to be “The Learning Channel”) has become The Who-Cares-What-We-Air-As-Long-As-It-Gets-Some-Buzz Channel. I’d rather hold up a candle to those who are working for change (like Pearson, like Boltz’s ex-wife Carol, and Kathy Baldock of Canyonwalker Connections. Let the light shine where there is good, because (as Jesus said), “The morons at TLC will be with you always, even unto the ends of the earth.”
I too do remember when TLC was just exactly what it’s name represented. It was a lot of “how to” shows and such as well. But unfortunately, networks are driven by ratings and whatever can stimulate ratings will be aired. The SyFy channel, one of my favorites, airs WWE wrestling. You tell me… is that science fiction? Well maybe their outfits can be deemed that… LOL 🙂
Hey Andrew. Really enjoyed your article on the TLC show. I have no desire to see it. For me, it’s like watching Mrs. Doubtfire. Brings up too much pain and memories. It’s sad so much of society makes us feel we have to hide what we’re really feeling.
I wasn’t going to watch it either but I felt it was a great topic to write about. 🙂 Thanks for commenting!