My Eye Is On The Sparrow

I look for signs of communication from my Higher Power everywhere these days. Not too long ago through I thought the God of my understanding only communicated with me through a message at a church service or maybe through a friend. But I’ve come to believe if God truly is omnipresent, then why can’t God talk to me in plenty of other ways such as through a sparrow in my backyard.

Recently I was sitting in a chair there, contemplating life and questioning how much longer I can endure these health issues I’ve been facing, when I suddenly tuned into a repetitive and very loud chirp nearby. I looked around for its source and noticed high up in the utility pole in the corner of my backyard sat a sparrow.

Chirp Chirp Chirp Chirp Chirp Chirp Chirp Chirp Chirp.

Given my frustration with my pain levels, I began to direct all of it upon this tiny sparrow as I watched it start to quickly build a nest between some wiring and cylinders on the pole. Any bit of peace and serenity I was trying to find out there in my backyard was somehow being eradicated with each and every one of its chirps. That’s when I decided it was becoming an unnecessary extension of my pain and proceeded to call the electrical company to come and remove the nesting that was there. I claimed it was a fire hazard and sure enough they came that very evening and looked at me like it was the most ridiculous call they had ever been sent to. In all honesty, it probably was looking back at this whole experience now. Anyway, the nesting was removed and I was promptly informed it was never a fire hazard in the first place. I was also told I could simply use a leaf blower the next time it happened.

Ironically, or maybe not so ironically, the innocent sparrow immediately returned to rebuilding its nest as soon as the electrical company worker left. Over the next few days I continued to direct my irritation over how I felt with my health upon this sparrow. Again and again I used my leaf blower, just as the power company had suggested, and blew any nesting away that was there. All of this started weighing heavily upon me though on one of those specific days after I had gone up my ladder for the umpteenth time and done that very action.

As I watched the sparrow not give up and hastily start rebuilding its nest yet again, I felt sad, wondering how I’d feel if I were it and my home kept getting destroyed. But even more importantly, as I looked around at all the utility poles nearby, I noticed not one of them had a single nest in it, which made me think there might be a deeper message here coming from my Higher Power than just feeling sad about a bird.

What if this sparrow’s determination to build its nest was a message for me to not give up in my own determination to heal given all the prayers I’ve sent to God lately due to my pain?

What if the message was to just keep on doing what I’ve been doing day after day after day to heal?

Simply put, maybe the nest I’ve been building for a while now is a healthier me. And maybe the main message here was to keep on building this nest like I have been, even when the wind blows, delivering me days of great pain, and knocking me down. I say all this because of how this story ends, at least with the sparrow.

After I came to acceptance that this might be a message my Higher Power was trying to communicate to me, I asked the sparrow to forgive me for my acts of control, sent it love and went back inside. A short time later, I decided to return outside and there sticking in my fence I have to open to enter my backyard was a piece of the bird’s nest. I instantly looked up and saw the bird happily making its nest grow bigger and bigger. That’s when I kneeled down on the ground and once again asked for forgiveness for the pain I had caused it, when suddenly it flew over to the gutter nearby and looked straight down at me. In that moment, while I can’t say that I heard its voice in human words, I felt in my heart a sense of peace and a thank you coming from this little sparrow.

As I watched it then fly back up to attending to its nest and soon to be breeding ground, I was glad I had kept my eye on the sparrow because it was through it that I truly believe God has been watching me…

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson