Q: What don’t comedians sleep for very long?
A: They do a lot of stand-up!
Andy’s Woodsy Adventure – Chapter 17
“Virgo!” I muttered it as quickly as possible and in the lowest tone as well, hoping my sister wouldn’t hear me. I then watched as the remaining pie and tub of ice cream toppled onto the porch deck, pieces of apples and crust spilling out everywhere.
“What did you just do!?” my sister Laura asked quite pointedly.
“I tripped, isn’t it obvious?!” I responded a little too sternly.
“That’s not what I’m talking about and you know that!”
“What’s the matter dear…Oh!” said my mother who had just come up the porch stairs herself and noticed the contents of the pie now splattered everywhere.
“I’m sorry, I was a little too clumsy I guess…” I said feeling bad.
I waited for my sister to say something to my mother about what she had seen, but she didn’t, much to my surprise. Mr. and Mrs. Riley then told me not to worry about the accident as they had just come up the steps themselves, while Chris looked over at me and then at my sister who was still intently staring at me. Her eyes said everything and I knew she wasn’t gong to let this one go.
After my mess was cleaned up and everything put away, I tried to put off my worried thoughts of when Laura was going to approach me again about what she might have seen. Thankfully, a game called Telestrations was able to distract those worries for a good hour or so. It was a lot of fun and dealt with combing sketching and that old kids telephone game of passing a message along. Our evening at the Riley’s soon came to an end not too much longer after we had finished playing the group game. As I was walking out the door with my family and saying my goodbyes to everyone, Chris abruptly pulled me aside.
“Did your sister see you use your powers?!” he whispered in an overly concerned tone.
“Yeah, I’m pretty sure she noticed the pie and ice cream hanging in mid-air…”
“Are you friggin’ serious? That might be a big problem.”
“I know, but she hasn’t said anything else about it,”
“Yet…Well just do what you do best if she asks about any of it.”
“What do you mean? Lie? I thought you said I shouldn’t do that?”
“Well I’m making an exception here.”
“Ugh, you make no sense. What kind of Keeper advice is that?”
“Just don’t do anything stupid.”
“Whatever, I’m sure I’ll handle it just fine.”
“Ok, call me tomorrow and let me know if anything happens.”
I then headed out the door, and silently walked home with my family, noticing my sister still looking over at me with that look like she knew something. When we arrived home, I immediately decided to call it a night, hoping that would alleviate any possibility of my sister cornering me about what she may or may not have seen. After saying goodnight to my parents, I just about ran up the stairs and brushed my teeth as fast as humanly possibly and then jetted into my bedroom, making sure to close the door firmly behind me. It wasn’t even two full minutes before my door suddenly flew back open.
“Talk or I’m telling.” My sister demanded.
“Tell you what?” I tried to play dumb.
“You know what I saw!”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Stop lying and stop playing stupid!”
“Well, what do you think you saw?”
I really wished Chris were here right now because I knew the inevitable was about to happen.
“I saw that apple pie and tub of ice cream suspended in the air when you were reaching out for it. How did you do that?!”
“I think your eyes were playing tricks on you Laura…”
“STOP IT! I know you had something to do with it! When we were back in the police station on the day you reappeared, I also saw how you were right next to me and then somehow in the blink of an eye, got to the other side of the room. You were telling us the truth the whole time about what happened to you in that cave weren’t you? And that crystal you showed us, it really does have each of the zodiac signs on it doesn’t it?
I couldn’t lie anymore and something inside me was telling me I should trust her. For the first time in my life, I decided to try.
“Yeah Laura, you’re correct…about everything.”
“I knew it! Show me how it works!”
“I’m still trying to figure it all out, and honestly, Chris has the crystal right now?”
“Why does he have it?”
“He’s considered the Keeper of the Zodiac and is its guardian.”
I then had to spend the next 30 minutes telling her everything, rehashing just about the entire story from the beginning when I had gone into the woods back during the summer to play at my favorite spot. I told her about almost getting trapped permanently inside that cave. I told her about how it had only been hours for me when I re-emerged, while it had been years for everyone else. I told her about the powers I had learned so far, including almost choking to death the first time I had tried the Cancer power. I told her about Chris’s special ability that took us to the place where we met the Council of the Zodiac. And I even told her about my first real day of training that had happened earlier today, where I had nearly killed Chris from throwing that huge boulder.
“Wow, all of that is really true?!”
“Yeah and sometimes I find I still can’t believe it myself.”
“Can’t you show me how one of your powers works? Do you have to have the crystal on you?”
“No, I don’t need to have the crystal on me and I guess it really wouldn’t hurt to show you at least one…”
“How about my sign? What does Leo do?”
“Yeah, you don’t want to see that one because all it does it increase my senses and your perfume might stink me out too much if I did.” I said laughing.
“Very funny. Ha ha. Seriously, how about showing me again what Virgo does?”
“Well I thought that one only had the ability to heal others, but it appears as if I can do telekinesis as well. Ok, let me try. Let’s see if I can lift that book off my desk.”
I then looked at the book, and pointed my right hand towards it, trying to direct all my energy on it. As I did, I thought about whether I was making a mistake or not. Should I really have told her everything? I looked over briefly at Laura and then thought about Chris. I could only imagine what he’d be saying to me right now. My sister had this look of excitement on her face and I wondered if I shouldn’t have told her the whole story and instead, kept on lying like Chris had told me to do. I wished for a moment that she had never noticed me using the Libra or Virgo abilities. But so far, she seemed totally cool with everything. I shrugged off my worry and then refocused my energy back onto the book, and watched as it levitated a few feet off the desk when suddenly Laura screamed in delight.
“Oh my God Andy, you’re back! YOU’RE BACK! I thought I’d never see you again,” she said as she grabbed me and gave me a huge hug. “Where have you been? When did you get home? How did I get in here? And holy shit, how is that book floating over the desk!”
“Laura, what’s wrong? What’s going on up there?!” my Mom shouted from downstairs obviously hearing her scream.
I looked up at my sister as she wept on my shoulder and knew I was in serious trouble. Dam it, why did I have to show her one of my powers…
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson