Getting Fully Honest And Back In Integrity, When I Really Wasn’t…

I wrote recently about how important having integrity is for me, given I used to be out of integrity more than not. And after writing about the subject, I realized there was still one person I wasn’t fully in integrity with, and in fact was on some level even being slightly dishonest with.

The person I’m speaking of is someone I’m in a spiritual men’s group with, that is not religious or 12-Step based. There, we practice living a life of integrity and honesty with each other and yet, I wasn’t fully doing that.

This all started over two months ago when this group member asked me to check out a new business he was becoming a part of, essentially one of those companies that you might consider to be “pyramid-based”. While I’ve actually worked for one for of those in my past and was courted by several others, it’s never been my forte. Yet, because of a character defect I’m still working on, one that revolves around people-pleasing those I find attractive, I told him I was interested, when I really wasn’t.

The real truth was that I just wanted to hang out with him as a friend and nothing more, yet this character defect of mine that used to rule my life led me to think the only way I could spend time with this person would be to express interest in what they were so passionate about.

So often in my past, I fell prey to this behavior, getting drawn into things like Harley Davidson’s, ultra-conservative churches, and even guns, none of which ultimately interest me on any level. Yet, because I people-pleased those I found attractive, I involved myself in things I loathed.

Thankfully, my Spirit lets me know rather quickly these days when I’m not living in integrity and am being dishonest on any level, which led me to have a meal a few days ago with this men’s group member. There, the first thing I did was get honest by telling him all of the above, which not only led to a much closer connection that was based more on Spirit than self, it also helped me to feel a lot better about myself and living closely to the ideals I speak of.

So, trust me when I saw that it’s not worth people-pleasing anyone, especially if it’s something you truly don’t want to do or be a part of, because in the end you will not only come to despise yourself and your actions, you might also come to a place where you resent something or someone as well, including yourself.

I’m just glad God is guiding my life now to get me so rapidly back into integrity and honesty in my life, because those are two qualities that are a must for me on the spiritual journey I’m trying to live on…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson