Silly Joke Friday

Silly Joke #1

A man rushed into the doctor’s office and shouted, “Doctor! I think I’m shrinking!” The doctor calmly responded, “Now, settle down. You’ll just have to be a little patient.”

Silly Joke #2

A 90-year-old man said to his doctor, “I’ve never felt better. I have an 21-year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that?” The doctor considered his question for a minute and then said, “I have an elderly friend who is a hunter and never misses a season. One day when he was going out in a bit of a hurry, he accidentally picked up his umbrella instead of his gun. When he got to the Creek, he saw a beaver sitting beside the stream. He raised his umbrella and went, ‘bang, bang’ and the beaver fell dead. What do you think of that?” The 90-year-old said, “I’d say somebody else shot that beaver!”  The doctor replied, “My point exactly.”

Silly Joke #3

At the urging of his doctor, Bill moved to Florida. After settling in, he met a neighbor who was also an older man. “Say, is this really a healthy place?”  “It sure is,” the man replied. “When I first arrived here I couldn’t say one word. I had hardly any hair on my head. I didn’t have the strength to walk across a room and I had to be lifted out of bed.” “That’s wonderful!” said Bill. “How long have you been here?” “I was born here…” replied the man.

Bonus Silly Joke

Before performing a baptism, the priest approached the young father and said solemnly, “Baptism is a serious step. Are you prepared for it?” “I think so,” the man replied. “My wife has made appetizers and we have a caterer coming to provide plenty of cookies and cakes for all of our guests.” “I don’t mean that,” the priest responded. “I mean, are you prepared spiritually?” “Oh, sure,” came the reply. “I’ve got a a few fifths of vodka and a several cases of whiskey on hand!”

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson