Thanks for joining with one more Grateful Heart Monday, where expression of gratitude remains my ongoing sole focus of my writing, which for today is somewhat of a follow-up to a prior article a number of months back, one where I truly thought a friendship with a couple I care about was over, and can say now that thankfully it isn’t.
I think all relationships go through a number of ebbs and flows, but to see them successfully navigate through them all , it means all parties involved must be willing to work on themselves. I’ve had many friendships that have failed because either myself or the other person, became caught up in ego and self-pride, holding onto righteous beliefs and feelings of “I don’t have to change” or “It’s all their fault and not mine.”
I don’t care whether a person is 11, 31, 51, or 91, all people are capable of change no matter what their age, me included, and as soon as I close my mind to that, and hold on to what I think is the only right answer to things, it puts me at odds with those who care about me, which is precisely what happened with my friends Bill and Tom when we all came down with Covid back in January.
The finite details of what happened back then don’t matter now, because it was those finite details that led to all of our ego’s going into opposite corners, rather than coming together with forgiveness, love, and the like. Regardless, for the past six months, I really missed the dinners and game nights we used to have regularly with them, so I finally broke the silence by reaching out to Bill to make my amends for my part in what happened, who in turn did the same with me. I took a second step in sitting down with Tom and listening to where my actions had negatively affected him, and I owned them, even learning in the process how I could be a better friend to him. It’s something I am truly grateful for about my personality, that I’m always willing to spiritually grow, where change is something I accept with grace, rather than fight it with ego.
Thankfully, my actions led to a huge blessing, with Bill and Tom becoming open to breaking bread with my partner Chris and I again, which we finally did just over a week ago now. After an evening of dinner at Carraba’s and coffee at Starbucks, I can thankfully say we all found the desire to move on from our ego’s and frustrations, to forgive, and move forward with connection again.
I am so very grateful that God pushed me forward to own my part in all this, to move beyond my ego and any selfish viewpoint I had on the whole matter, as it ultimately helped to begin the process of reconnection with two friends I do love dearly.
And as I end today’s Grateful Heart Monday, I am thankful for all the friends who remain a part of my life today, because the addict I once was had no friends whatsoever, except my sister Laura and my friend Cedric who never gave up on me. Both believed in me and showed me how to become humble, humble enough to ask God for help, humble enough to say I’m sorry, and humble enough to forgive. It’s those traits that truly keep my friendships going, with loving people who care about me, people just like Bill and Tom.
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson