Silly Joke #1
Little Johnny walked into a pharmacy one day, picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.
The man at the counter asked the older boy, “Son, how old are you?”
“Eight,” Little Johnny replied.
The man continued, “Do you know what these are used for?”
Little Johnny replied, “Not exactly, but they aren’t for me. They’re for my younger brother.”
The man replied, “Son, I’m not sure if you really understand what these are used for?”
Little Johnny replied, “Sure I do! It said on TV that if you use these you would be able to swim and ride a bike without any problems! And right now, my little brother can’t do either one!”
Silly Joke #2
A married couple was celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. At the party everybody wanted to know how they managed to stay married so long in this day and age. The husband responded, “When we were first married we came to an agreement — I would make all the major decisions and my wife would make all the minor decisions. And in 60 years of marriage we have never needed to make a major decision.”
Silly Joke #3
A passenger train suddenly slows down and comes to a complete halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. “What the heck is going on?” she yells out the window. “Cow on the track Ma’am!” replies the conductor. Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it suddenly stops again. The woman sees the same conductor walking by again. She leans out the window and yells, “What the hell! I guess we happened to catch up to that cow again!”
Bonus Silly Joke (Adult Humor)
A doctor and his wife are having an argument in the morning over breakfast and the doctor blurts out, “You know what? You’re not that great in bed anyways!” So he goes off to work and thinks it over and decides to call his wife and make amends…..He calls the house and the phone rings many, many times and then his wife finally answers the phone completely out of breath….The doctor says, “What were you doing?” and she says, “l was in bed!” The doctor responds, “What were you doing in bed so late in the day?” The wife then curtly replied, “Getting a second opinion!”
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
