Silly Joke Friday

Silly Joke #1

While proudly showing off his new fraternity house to friends, a college student led the way into the great room. “What’s the big brass gong and hammer for?” one of his friends asked. “That’s the talking clock”, the new fraternity brother replied with a grin. “Let me show you how it works!” And with that, he gave the gong an ear-shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly someone screamed from the other side of the wall, “KNOCK IT OFF, YOU IDIOT! IT’S 2:22 AM!!!”

Silly Joke #2

A daughter now out on her own calls her mother and asks, “Hey Mom, what do you think are some of the character qualities I should be looking for in a marriage partner? You know, for someone that I could spend the rest of my life with? The mother replied, “That’s a great question dear, but I think you should talk to your father, as he did far better than I did!”

Silly Joke #3

A man heads to the emergency room with several large bruises on his legs that was causing him to seriously limp. The doctor asks him what happened as he examines him. Well, it was like this, said the man. I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows. We went to look for it, and while I was rooting around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was my wife’s golf ball……..stuck right in the middle of the cow’s butt. That’s when I made a big mistake. “What did you do?” asks the doctor. Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, “Hey, this looks like yours!”

Bonus Silly Joke

John: Do you know my ex kept trying to humiliate me last night at a bar we ran into each other at?
Mike: Really? What did she do?
John: She kept telling her friends that I was a bad lover…
Mike: That sucks, didn’t that bother you?
John: Not really, because you should have seen her face when they all disagreed!

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson