Silly Joke #1
Mary Poppins was traveling home, but due to worsening weather, she decided to stop at a hotel for the night. She approached the receptionist and asked for a room for the night. “Certainly madam,” he replied courteously. “Is the restaurant open still?” inquired Mary. “Sorry, no,” came the reply, “but room service is available all night. Would you care to select something from this menu?” Mary smiled and took the menu and perused it. “Hmm, the cauliflower and cheese special sounds interesting, I’ll have that,” said Mary. “Certainly, madam,” he replied. “And can I have breakfast in bed?” asked Mary politely. The receptionist nodded and smiled. “In that case, I would love a couple of poached eggs, please,” Mary mused. After confirming the order, Mary signed in and went up to her room for the night. The night passed uneventfully and the next morning Mary came down early to check out. The same guy was still on the desk. “Morning madam…sleep well?”” Yes, thank you,” Mary replied. “Was all the food to your liking?” “Well, I have to say the cauliflower cheese special was exceptional! But the eggs, though….they really weren’t that good at all,” replied Mary truthfully. “Oh…well, perhaps you could contribute these thoughts to our Guest Comments Book. We are always looking to improve our service and would value your opinion,” said the receptionist. “OK, I will…thanks!” replied Mary….who checked out, then scribbled a comment into the book. Waving, she left to continue her journey. Curious, the receptionist picked up the book to see the comment Mary had written which was oddly just one word…“Supercauliflowercheesebuteggswerequiteatrocious!”
Silly Joke #2
A young couple decided to invite their very aged pastor for Sunday dinner. While they were in the kitchen preparing the meal, the minister asked Little Johnny in the other room, always known for saying the most inappropriate of things, what they were having to eat that night. “Goat,” Little Johnny replied. “Goat?” replied the startled man of the cloth, “Are you sure about that?” “Yep,” said Little Johnny. “Dad told Mom yesterday that we really needed to have that old goat for dinner before it was too late, except I’m not too sure what they meant by before it was too late?”
Silly Joke #3
Therapist: “So why do you want to end your marriage?”
Wife: “Because I really hate all his constant star wars puns.”
Husband: “Divorce is strong with this one!”
Wife: “See what I mean!!!”
Therapist: “Yes. Wise one, you are. But I sense the dark side growing in you…”
Bonus Silly Joke
A handsome man and a beautiful woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away suddenly noticed that the man had slid down his chair and under the table while the woman he was with acted unconcerned. The waitress thought something seriously inappropriate was about to happen in her restaurant as she watched the woman remain appeared calm and unruffled. After the waitress finished taking another order, she went over to the table and said to the woman, “Pardon me, ma’am, but this is a classy establishment and I think your husband needs to stop doing something inappropriate under there. The woman calmly looked up at her and replied firmly, “Well I guess if my husband walking in the restaurant door just now is inappropriate, then I guess you’re right?”
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
