Silly Joke #1
The teacher was trying to help his students on map reading. He spent the class explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes. Towards the end of class, the teacher asked his students, “Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude…” Little Johnny, that mischievous little boy who always said the most inappropriate of things as a kid and still did as a young adult responded, “Well sir, I guess you’d be eating alone!”
Silly Joke #2
An elementary school teacher decides to pole the class on the difficulty of last night’s homework assignment: How many people were able to complete the assignment without their parents help? About 75% of the class raised their hands. How many people we able to complete the assignment with a little help from your parents? The remaining students all raised their hands, all except for Little Johnny. The teacher then asked Little Johnny who always said the most inappropriate of things, why he hadn’t raised his hand for either question. Little Johnny responded, “Well, you asked if I had completed my assignment on my own or with a little help from my parents. In my case, it was neither because my parents did my entire assignment for me!”
Silly Joke #3
Little Johnny who always said the most inappropriate of things came home eating a big candy bar. Seeing the candy bar, his mother remembered he had already spent all his allowance money. Surprised, she asked him where he got it. “I bought it at the store with the dollar you gave me,” he said.”But that dollar was for Sunday School,” his mother replied. Smiling, the boy said, “I know, Mom, but the Pastor met me at the door at the church and he let me in for free!”
Bonus Silly Joke (Adult Humor)
A guy goes over to his friends house, rings the bell. The wife answers the door. “Hi, is Tony home?” “No, he went to the store.” “Well, you mind if I wait?” “No come in.” They sit down and the friend says, “You know Sara, you have the greatest breasts I have ever seen. I’d give you a hundred bucks if I could just see one.” Sara thinks about this for a second and figures what the hell – a hundred bucks. She opens her robe and shows one. He promptly thanks her and throws a 100 bucks on the table. They sit there a while longer and Chris says, “They are so beautiful I’ve got to see the both of them. I’ll give you another 100 bucks if I could just see the both of them together.” Sara thinks about this and says what the hell opens her robe and gives Chris a nice long look. Chris thanks her and throws another 100 bucks on the table then says he can’t wait any longer for Tony and leaves. A while later Tony arrives home and his wife says, “You know, your weird friend Chris came over.” Tony responds, “Well I guess he can be a little weird sometimes, but hey, did he happen to drop off the $200 he owes me?”
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
