Finding A Balance Between Work And Rest

“There is virtue in work and there is virtue in rest. Use both and overlook neither.” (Alan Cohen)

Today’s quote is for a very specific reason. I truly feel I need to take a break from writing in my blog for a few weeks. I had always planned on doing that in February when I usually go on my annual vacation, but in all honesty, I really think I need one much sooner. So given the upcoming Christmas and New Year’s holidays and given that I do have a close friend coming in to visit for almost a week, I decided that maybe the next few weeks would be a great time for me to take a small rest from writing.

So often I’ve not done that for myself and instead pushed myself to the limits of one extreme versus the other. Sadly, the only thing that’s ever done is drive me into shut down mode or something even worse, such as an addiction that just numbs me. I definitely don’t want to get to either of those places, which is why I feel it’s so important to balance my work and my rest.

I also feel it’s very important that I let you know how much I appreciate each of you who continue to read my words and get something out of them for your own spiritual journeys in life. I’m truly blessed by that and on some level, it helps to keep me going day in and day with all of what I’ve been dealing with in life.

With that being said, I want to wish each and every one of you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. And in the meantime, I hope each of you will enjoy the “Thought For The Day” entries I place in here until I return with a new article for January 1st.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

December’s Questions For You To Ponder (Holiday Themed!)

It’s time for another batch of questions for everyone to ponder. 🙂 This time I decided to utilize a Christmas and New Year’s theme! And while I know most of these aren’t necessarily “spiritual”, I thought it might be fun to ask them nonetheless. I hope you will continue to take some time to mull them each over, and as always, my own answers are listed below.

  1. How do you normally spend your Christmas Eve?
  2. What is your favorite Christmas Eve memory?
  3. How do you normally spend your Christmas Day?
  4. What is your favorite Christmas Day memory?
  5. If you could have one person, alive or deceased, join you for this year’s entire Christmas Day, who would it be?
  6. How do you normally spend your New Year’s Eve?
  7. What is your favorite New Year’s Eve memory?
  8. Have you ever made a New Year’s resolution and kept it, if so what was it?
  9. How do you normally spend your New Year’s Day?
  10. What is your favorite New Year’s Day memory?

And one more for good measure as always:

  1. What does Christmas mean to you overall?

My answers:

  1. Growing up it was having Mexican Tamale Casserole and singing Christmas carols. Today it’s usually going out to dinner somewhere and maybe watching a movie.
  2. Playing Christmas carols on the piano while everyone sang the songs.
  3. Growing up it was having an egg casserole in the morning, opening stockings, then presents, then playing with my new toys, and then having a huge turkey feast. This year my partner is making a turkey and ham dinner, my friend Cedric from Boston will be here visiting, and then we’ll be making the family rounds.
  4. Being surprised with a sudden trip to the airport and flying to Los Angeles, California.
  5. My mother or father.
  6. Growing up it was having hors d’oeuvres and watching the ball come down in Times Square on Dick Clark’s Rockin’ New Year’s Eve. Today it will most likely be playing cards or games with a friend or two somewhere and then watching the ball come down in Times Squre.
  7. I can’t honestly say I have one that stands out.
  8. None of my New Year’s Resolutions have ever lasted very long.
  9. Watching television, going to the movie theater, or just lounging around.
  10. I can’t honestly say I have one that stands out here either.
  11. This answer has changed so greatly for me over the years. I guess I’d have to say that these days it means just being around those I truly love and who truly love me unconditionally because that’s what the love of Christ is to me…unconditional love.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

Sex And Love Addiction And Boundaries

Just recently I had someone strongly make a sexual suggestion towards me that was definitely not coming from a joking around place. While I was completely taken aback by the whole incident, what surprised me even more was how they fully knew I was already in a committed relationship with someone else. Interestingly enough, I didn’t react angrily one bit to the incident solely because I too have done behaviors just like this when I was active in a sex and love addiction.

The last time this happened was over three and a half years ago now. Back then I had no boundaries and I walked over everyone else’s as well. Whether someone had a partner or not never mattered to me, I only thought of myself. More times than I can count, I made strong sexual suggestions to those I knew who were attracted to me but already committed to someone else because I was so caught up in my selfishness and self-centeredness. In other words, I only thought about what I could get out of a situation rather than what I could bring into it.

So when I used to see someone I thought was attractive and discovered they found me attractive as well, I began to play my own game to try to snag them all for me. And this of course was regardless of whether they were already in a committed relationship or not. Some used to call me a home wrecker, which today I will honestly and sadly acknowledge I most definitely was back then.

But you see that’s just what happens when one succumbs to the disease of sex and love addiction. Because in an addiction like that, the only thing that ultimately matters is one getting their sexual and intimate gratification in any way they can.

Thankfully today I can see all this quite clearly, especially when someone else is acting as nothing more than a mirror for me. A mirror that is only showing me a glimpse into my sick past where I would offer things such as a strong sexual suggestion to someone else without even thinking of how it may impact them.

Sex and love addiction is real and many people suffer from it without even knowing it. Thank God I’m in recovery for it for a good while now and can have compassion towards others who are only doing to me what I once did to everyone else. And thank God my recovery is strong enough today to keep my boundaries in place and resist the temptation that may try to come my way…

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson