Daily Reflection

“Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when people succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.” (Psalm 37:7)

Lately I’ve been finding it really hard to remain patient on God with my health and healing mostly because of what I constantly see going on around me. I know plenty of people who are receiving social security disability and are fully capable of working, and actually doing so under the table. I know of others who are regularly doing or selling drugs and prospering just fine as well. Then there are those I know who are married and been having adulterous relationships on the side for years, all the while having no real complaints in life. And of course there are those too I know who are overly engaging in any number of other things such as alcohol, gambling, sex, smoking, and the like, most of which haven’t been facing any real problems in life either. Yet I have been doing everything I can to stay healthy on every conceivable level and still find myself struggling on most days to feel any joy within due to the overwhelming level of pain I continue to experience. Maybe this is why human beings often tend to lack in patience because it’s generally far easier to find a quicker way to feel good in life. I should know I did that for years, but living that way did catch up with me eventually. So while I may not understand right now why I continue to deal with as many health issues as I do, I know I’m doing my absolute best to be still and wait patiently upon God for relief. Because I also know that any scheme I could try to pursue to quickly feel better in life will inevitably only end with me in greater pain and having to still wait patiently upon God for that relief.

I pray to continue remaining patient upon God for relief from all of my burdens in life and to not allow any schemes or quick fixes that others might be doing around me to lead me astray.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

Daily Reflection

“We do not like to pronounce any individual as alcoholic, but you can quickly diagnose yourself. Step over to the nearest barroom and try some controlled drinking. Try to drink and stop abruptly. Try it more than once. It will not take long for you to decide, if you are honest with yourself about it. It may be worth a bad case of jitters if you get a full knowledge of your condition.” (Bill Wilson)

I’m often drawn to these very words that Bill Wilson wrote in the Alcoholics Anonymous book solely because I believe they can be related to a lot more conditions in life than just an alcohol problem. How many times I’ve come to that place in life where I realized I was doing something that was unhealthy for me, stopped it for a period of time, then told myself later it was never that bad and convinced myself to try it again. I’ve actually done that “controlled barroom drinking approach” in so many facets of my life I’ve lost count and every time I have tried it, my case of “jitters” only grew worse. In fact, the last time I tried to control one of my unhealthy behaviors, I ended up attempting suicide. I’ve come across similar horror stories from plenty of other people who tried the controlled approach themselves. Some went to prison in the process, while others suffered major medical traumas, a bunch experienced huge financial losses, and sadly a few even lost their lives. Unfortunately, in this day and age, the “controlled drinking approach” isn’t always ending with just a bad case of “jitters” anymore. Nowadays it seems to be causing a lot more damage and wreckage than ever before. That’s why I thank God everyday I don’t attempt this controlled approach anymore once I realize I have a problem with something, because I know the only thing that will come out of one more attempt at trying it, is a slew of pain, and doesn’t life already have enough of that?

I pray that once I realize I have a problem with something in life and know it’s not healthy for me to do anymore, that I don’t try to control it and instead, seek guidance from my Higher Power to abstain from it for good. 

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

The Hall & Oates Concert

I haven’t been to many concerts throughout my life so far, about three actually if I was to be exact. For some reason, it never has quite appealed to me sitting in a large crowd listening to someone perform their music very loudly when I could hear it much better in the comfort of my own home or car. While there have been a few artists who I always said I’d go see if they came around locally to perform, I never made any effort to do so when they did. That was until recently when one of my favorite groups of all time, Hall & Oates, came into town for a concert in the amphitheater at the Toledo Zoo.

I totally grew up liking just about every song Hall & Oates put out on the airwaves. Some of my favorites included Maneater, Kiss On My List, Private Eyes, and I Can’t Go For That. When I hear any of these songs or plenty of others from this group played on the airwaves today, I’m always reminded of some good memories from my younger years. My mother unquestionably loved this group as much as I did and the two of us would often sing the lyrics of the songs together when we heard them over the radio. I probably shouldn’t admit to the other good memory though because it’s a little embarrassing, but I will anyway by saying I used to dance to them alone in front of a huge mirror in the living room of my childhood home.

So you can probably imagine how excited I was when I learned Hall & Oates was coming to Toledo in the end of July to perform. And if it gives you any idea how much I truly like this group, I decided it was absolutely necessary to overcome my dislike of crowded concerts solely to attend theirs. I immediately purchased tickets for my partner and I the day they went on sale and we were four rows back from the stage with an aisle seat and the next one in.

I must say I did have a big fear sit within me on and off all the way up to the day of their actual performance. Given my health issues having been so unpredictable as of late, I worried that I might not be able to enjoy the concert if my pain levels were high. I’m thankful to report though that fear never came to fruition. In fact, I felt well enough to even stand and dance a little in front of my seat throughout the night. And other than a few drunken people who kept invading my personal space during it, I have to say it was well worth the $160 I splurged for the two tickets.

But I think the best memory I’m going to remember of me at this concert is the one where I paused bobbing my head for a moment while I sat there in my seat. As it was then when I thought of my mother, hoping she was there somehow, sitting next to me, and singing along just like we used to do together when I was a kid. This is why I fully believe that music really can be a key to the soul sometimes, because Hall & Oates did exactly that for me when one of their songs re-connected me to a mother who I miss dearly, and that alone was priceless…

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson