According to some recent statistics, approximately 80% of all the people in the United States identify themselves as a Christian and 84% of the world’s population maintain some level of religious faith and following. What this means is that approximately 8 in every 10 people in both this country and throughout the entire world hold some level of belief in a Higher Power. Given those staggering numbers, I am very troubled by the amount of people who continue to have a hard time forgiving someone who has apparently wronged them in some way, shape, or form when one of the greatest principles of building faith is also in carrying love and forgiveness for everyone.
Why do people continue to hold onto their grudges like they are a best friend? Do people realize that every major religion in this world practices forgiveness in their doctrines? While I’m not a religious person, I do consider myself a spiritual one and follow many of the same teachings and beliefs that Jesus, Ghandi, Buddha, and Muhammad held. In Christianity especially, Jesus always practiced forgiveness to everyone and yet isn’t it ironic that when 8 out of every 10 people in the United States identify themselves as Christians, we still have many hate crimes, violence, and bloodshed that all revolve around the lack of forgiveness.
For the longest time I identified myself as a Christian but was so far from living that way. I carried many grudges like badges of honor and felt hate towards so many. All that did was make me a very negative and angry person who held a tainted view on life. And the more that people “crossed my path”, the more grudges I carried. And the more grudges I carried, the more I disliked everything in life, including myself.
I’ve learned that carrying a grudge is like wanting to have cancer in my body. I’m sure if I went up to anyone who was carrying a grudge and said that they were carrying cancer by holding onto their resentments, most would likely do whatever they could to let them all go. But most don’t realize the poison that is building within their body by carrying any type of grudge.
I believe that God is the opposite of a grudge and is instead, all about forgiveness. There are so many examples in all of the major religions of that, even in the ones that don’t specifically believe in one deity. I have chosen today to not follow any of those religious because I don’t want to put myself in a box. But what I do follow is a higher set of guidelines, ones which allow love for everyone and ones that work on forgiving all those who have ever harmed me, even the most painful ones.
The three most painful ones I have ever had to practice forgiveness towards was with an adult man who molested me, my father who committed suicide, and my mother who spent the last few years of her life drunk. In each of those cases, I held onto to a lot of anger and rage and couldn’t forgive any of them for years. My health suffered as a result on every possible level. When I finally came to a place of healing and forgiveness with all of them, it was as if I became a lighter person.
While I don’t have proof that toxicity builds in the body when one holds onto a grudge and refuses to forgive, I do know that nothing good ever came out of it when I did. The closer I’ve become to God in my life, the more I’ve realized that I need to do what I can to be an example for others in practicing love, forgiveness, and peace for everyone. I am one of those 8 in 10 people in this world who maintains some level of faith in a Higher Being. My Higher Being is God who I know always forgives, so why shouldn’t I too?
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson