Category: Daily Reflection

“Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” (Confucius)

The following is a true story from one of the spiritual publications I read daily that really reminded me of an invaluable lesson I’ve faced in life a number of times.

“Many years ago, my stepfather, a retired engineer, went out to oversee his vegetable garden. He noticed excessive puddles of water scattered throughout his yard. There had been no rain and so it seemed that an aging pipe or water main break was to blame. He estimated the route of the underground line and began digging up the lawn in hopes of finding the source of the problem. Holes turned into trenches, and his backyard soon became a mixture of dirt piles, mud, and mysterious expanding puddles of water. After fruitless hours of digging, he searched for the garden hose to clean himself off and call for backup. It was then he discovered the outdoor faucet was already turned on. Water had surged out of the mouth of the hose and had been flowing into the yard for well over a day. He had forgotten to turn it off the last time he’d watered the garden.”

How many times have I done something just like this? Countless. There was that time I was at the International World Convention for Alcoholics Anonymous in San Antonio in 2010 where I had just gone to the bathroom and was now out in a very busy hallway with thousands of other people heading to various meetings. I went to make a phone call when I suddenly realized I couldn’t find my cell phone. I frantically searched the floor around me and then retraced my steps to the bathroom, thinking maybe I had placed it on the urinal, only to discover from some very annoyed individuals attempting to relieve themselves that there was nothing sitting there in front of them. As my heart raced and raced, panic setting in, I emerged back into the crowded hallway once more and thrusted my hands in frustration into my back pockets to rest them there from swinging so wildly in the air, whereupon I discovered my phone had been with me the entire time!

Why do we make things like this so complicated? Is it our ego? Probably. I’ve definitely wasted countless bouts of energy over the years in many different projects overcomplicating things that were meant to be so simple. It’s why I tend to avoid at all costs doing any of those assemble-at-home types of furniture from places like IKEA. And dare I say how many times I’ve had incidents just like that “lost phone” occur in my life? If I only took a moment to slow down and take a deep breath when things like this happen!

You see, that’s always been my problem. Fear strikes and I react. I run headfirst into a situation trying to solve it with rash thinking, rather than slowing down, assessing the entire situation, breathing deeply, and allowing the Spirit from within to lend a hand. But, I find the more I slow down when any crisis strikes, rather than exasperate myself into anger, frustration and fear trying to solve it, the more I allow myself to breathe through the issue, and the more the solution seems to come through something very simple and usually quite painless too.

Dear God, please remind me the next time any problem strikes, to take a moment and breathe, and allow You to work from within me, so that I may see the solution with far more simplicity and far less complexity… 

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

“Do not use harmful words, but only helpful words, the kind that build up and provide what is needed, so that what you say will do good to those who hear you.” (Ephesians: 4:29)

Have you ever noticed how many people these days seem to like using social media to criticize someone else’s posts, rather than focusing on anything positive about them? Why do so many seem to steer more towards seeing the negative in another and commenting on that, rather than commenting on any of their positive qualities? Is it just easier to express negative viewpoints of another, rather than ones that uplift and praise them?

First off, I’ve always learned that one can only see the positive in another, if they see the positive in themselves first. When one is a positive person, it’s usually because they have a good amount of self-love behind it, which in turn leads them to see and concentrate more on the positive traits in another. My mother didn’t love herself much at all when she was alive and because of it, she tended to be more negative than anything. She frequently cited out all the things about my sister and I that she felt could use improvement, instead of lifting us up and praising our accomplishments. All that did was give us the worst of self-esteems, even though she truly believed it was going to help us to become healthier and better individuals.

Ever since, I’ve had many friends and partners who have been just like her, constantly pointing out all my flaws and shortcomings and any areas they felt I could improve. None of it was ever really helpful for me in the long run, because it only made me loathe myself a lot more and in turn, made me see the negative in others, because that’s what I saw in myself from all that constant criticism.

Thankfully, I’ve learned through it all that it’s far better to offer helpful words, to praise and uplift one’s achievements, then to cite out anything negative. As when someone places a negative comment on my any of my blogs for example, and then justifies it’s just them being honest and helpful. It isn’t helpful to me at all, in any way, shape, or form, as it only makes me doubt myself even greater. The same is true when someone hears me at a speaking engagement and the first thing out of their mouth is a comment on something they didn’t agree with. That too is more harmful than helpful because ultimately, I’ve had enough criticism of my life to last an eternity.

The last thing I need are people in my life these days who tend to comment on the negative parts of me, rather than the positive ones. What I need more of now are people who utilize helpful words, that build me up rather than tear me down, that motivate me instead of discourage me, that nurture me, rather than harm me.

Nevertheless, if we want to build a world with a lot more positivity, wouldn’t it be better for all of us to cite out the good we see in others, and not the bad? I’m inclined to believe from my own journey that citing out anyone’s negative attributes will only lead to them seeing themselves in greater negativity, which in turn will lead to them seeing the world around them in greater negativity as well.

So maybe we should all begin to use more helpful words than harmful ones. Ones that focus on a person’s achievements, accomplishments, and positive traits, that build a person’s character more up than down. And maybe we should all start by doing that with ourselves first, as when we do, we’ll be able to see that far greater in the world around us to the point where we share from that perspective instead…

I pray to love myself enough that I focus on all the good I am and all the positive traits I bring, and in turn, start seeing that in the rest of the world enough to where I communicate that more so than anything else.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.” (Colossians 3:12)

During these most uncertain times we are all living in currently due to COVID-19, I’ve definitely noticed an increase in negative behaviors amongst us all. We all seem to be living on edge, waiting with baited breath for the next ball to drop on us so to speak. With the news constantly having so very little positive information to give us, it’s been challenging to see any light at the end of the tunnel. No one really knows how long this whole pandemic is going to last and the longer people remain out of work, forced to remain at home, with very little to do, and no money coming in, the more it seems as if these negative behaviors are on the rise. Behaviors that include being unkind, arguing, demeaning, blaming, selfish, hoarding, judging, and impatient.

Look, I know how easy it is to point the finger and say any of those negative behaviors is only because of these uncertain times. Just as much as I know how easy it is to point the finger in general at someone or something else and place the blame elsewhere. But, what’s not so easy is pointing the finger at ourselves and taking a hard look at our own behaviors. Because neither the mayor of our towns, nor the governors of our states, nor the congressman and senators from where we live, nor our president or any of his administration are in charge of how we act and what we say or do.

It is all of our jobs to help make this difficult time a more bearable one by being more compassionate, kind, humble, gentle, and patient with each other. But blaming this pandemic crisis on our negative behaviors or blaming them on all those who are in some level of political power handling this crisis isn’t a valid reason for any of us to act negatively towards each other.

Because when it comes right on down to it, once this whole COVID-19 pandemic is over, any person who has been pointing the finger away from themselves this whole time as to why they’ve been negatively acting the way they have, is only going to transfer the blame for their negative behaviors onto someone or something else all over again.

The bottom line is that COVID-19, Donald Trump, our government, those who aren’t responding to this crisis in the way we think they should be responding, or anyone or anything else are not valid reasons to treat any single person in any way we wouldn’t want to be treated ourselves. We all need to stop blaming everyone else for our negative behaviors during these most challenging times, and instead work hard to show each other the compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience we ourselves would want and deserve to receive in return.

God, I pray that You help me to overcome any of my negative behaviors and help me instead to be more compassionate, kind, humble, gentle, and patient with everyone I come across, even when I may struggle to feel those things myself.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson