Category: Daily Reflection

These entries focus on a quote that spiritually inspired me. Each are followed by a personal experience in my life that relates to the quote and are concluded with a closing prayer.

Daily Reflection

“You can’t save a relationship unless both people are equally invested. It takes a joint effort to make it work. One person trying will never be enough.” (Tony Gaskins)

A close friend of mine has been going through a rough time lately in his relationship ever since he went on a spiritual retreat and became part of a men’s organization to begin healing from his many past wounds. Instead of his partner supporting his new efforts to spiritually grow or making any attempts to work on themselves, they’ve resorted to using guilt, shame, manipulation, and self-pity.

What’s interesting is that I can totally relate to their current dynamics, as I’ve stood in both of their shoes many times throughout my life. Watching someone I’m close to rapidly start to change in front of my eyes because of the healing work they’re doing can feel so very threatening, especially when I’m not working on myself. This is mainly because it creates the feeling that the other person is growing apart from me and in all reality, they actually are. But alas, resorting to guilt, shame, manipulation, or self-pity, instead of looking at myself and doing my own work to heal, has only ever pushed my relationships in the very direction I didn’t want them to go, that being apart.

As for the other side of the coin, seeing someone I care about deeply, avoiding looking at themselves and their own inner wounds, causes a problem for me any time I try to make repeated attempts to get them to do their own healing work. Doing so tends to create resentment in them and a further resistance to change. And ultimately, it’s fear that’s consistently been the element present whenever I’ve stood in either of these shoes. But unfortunately, choosing to live in that fear, rather than focusing on changing myself has only ever caused the demise of those relationships.

You see it’s like two plants sitting next to each other, where one gets watered, while the other does not. The one that does, flourishes, while the other that doesn’t, withers away and dies. This is precisely what happens when one person in any kind of relationship chooses not to water themselves and face their fears, while the other one does.

Thankfully I learned this lesson over time and find myself in a lot healthier connections now because of it, ones where we both are working on healing and growing in our own unique ways, yet united together on a spiritual journey with God more at the helm, than ourselves.

I pray I may always place the focus on healing myself in each my relationships in life and let God be the one to guide those I’m in those relationships with to do their own work, as that truly is the only way I know those relationships can be successful.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Daily Reflection

“How people treat you is your karma, how you react is yours.” (Wayne Dyer)

Many, many years ago, I got invited to a surprise 30th birthday party for a friend from a church I once belonged to. I was so excited to attend this festivity that I entirely forgot it was a surprise when the date loomed near. In my momentary memory lapse, I called the very friend who the celebration was for, asking for directions to where her party was being held. When she said that I probably didn’t mean to call her and that I might want to try someone else, I suddenly remembered it was supposed to be a surprise and quickly hung up. A few days later I nervously showed up at the event and immediately saw my church friend upon arriving. I gave her a hug and told her how sorry I was and then asked for her forgiveness. She said there was nothing to forgive, knowing it had been a simple mistake, and was only happy that I had still showed up, of which I was greatly relieved. I embraced her once more and then headed out into the backyard where most of the party was, feeling a lot better. As I poured myself a Diet Coke, I unexpectedly heard a female voice shout from behind, “Are you A.D.!!!?” (“A.D.” was the nickname I used to go by for almost two decades of my life and was what most of my friends only knew me as back then.) I then turned around to see a large woman, face very red and hands clenched, standing directly in front of me. After responding that I was indeed “A.D.”, she angrily screamed, “You have some f*$king nerve showing up here after what you did, spoiling this surprise and all! We planned this for months and months and you ruined it in under one minute!!! You really are an a$$hole you know!” By that point, everyone there was now staring at me and while my ego wanted to fight back, my spirit told me to take the higher path. I opted for the latter and humbly responded, “I know I ruined the surprise and I’m truly sorry for that. I asked for the birthday girl’s forgiveness as soon as I arrived and already received that. It’s my hope that you may forgive me too. I really am sorry…” The angry woman then huffed and puffed and couldn’t seem to manage to speak any more coherent words. She then instantly stormed off in a total frenzy, while everyone looked at me in complete surprise. Ironically, I wasn’t mad, upset, or anything of the sort, instead I actually felt sad for this woman because she hadn’t been able to get past her resentment of me. One of my friends who had been standing nearby when all this happened then abruptly asked, “How were you able to keep your cool? I would have totally gone off on that cow!!!” I responded with the only thing that was upon my heart at the time and said, “Because I know it’s what Jesus would have done…” When I left the party later that day, I felt like I had finally created some good karma for once in my life and have done my very best over the years to follow the same higher path when experiences like this happen, because they occasionally do. Ultimately, the last thing I want is to create any more bad karma, as that will only become a stumbling block to my life’s quest of drawing closer to God.

I pray that I may speak from a place of unconditional love any time I’m confronted with the opposite and I pray that I always channel the love of Christ whenever I come face to face with hate.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Daily Reflection

“Rest and self-care are so important. When you take time to replenish your spirit it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.” (Eleanor Brown)

It’s easy to get caught up in the notion that there’s not enough time in the day to get everything done. Trust me, I’ve lived that pattern, cramming so many things into my schedule that by the time my head hit the pillow, I was completely overwhelmed and feeling run down, only to repeat the process all over again immediately the very next day. And it seemed like every time I did this for an extended period, I constantly succumbed to a cold, a virus, or sickness of some sort that forced me to stay home, rest, and take care of myself. Soon I began to realize this wasn’t a good way to exist. That’s why I started regularly taking time to rest and do various amounts of self-care, including things such as watching my favorite television programs, doing some writing, meditating, reading a novel, working on a puzzle, sitting on the rocks down by the lake, or just lying on my couch with my cat purring on my chest. Each of them appear to rejuvenate my spirit just enough to help me be of much greater capacity to serve others. Take last week for example. I opted to remain home one Tuesday evening while my partner went off to one of our standing social engagements because I honestly felt really tired. While my ego wanted me to still go, my spirit kept nudging me to take care of myself and that I did. So instead, I meditated for forty-five minutes, ate some healthy leftovers, and then watched two uplifting television programs on my couch with my cat curled up on me. And by the time my partner arrived home later that night, I felt a lot better and was far more present with him then how I would have been if I had gone out with him. I’m so thankful to God I see the importance of taking those daily moments to rest and do a little self-care nowadays, because the alternative, getting sick and being forced to do it anyway, is a lot less enticing, now isn’t it?

I pray I listen to those gentle nudges that often come from within, which remind me to take care of myself, to rest, and replenish my spirit on a daily basis. As I know in doing so, it will allow me to serve others in a far greater capacity, then if I don’t.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson