Category: Grateful Heart Monday

Welcome to another chapter of Grateful Heart Monday, where I begin each week with a single piece of gratitude, which for today is for my parents, Lew and Pam.

It’s been a long time since my father and mother were alive. My father passed in 1996 and my mother in 2005 and honestly, there are days where it feels like they’ve been gone for far longer, and yet there are days where it’s hard to fathom how much time has actually gone by since their passing’s.

Nevertheless, it’s quite ironic that I am so grateful for my parents these days, given how resentful I was towards them for much of my life. Because of their alcoholism and mental health issues, I held onto the belief that I never got the childhood, or the early adulthood for that matter, that I deserved. Yet, through all the 12 Step work I’ve done I’ve been able to remove any resentments I had with them, which in turn has allowed me to see my parents in a totally different light, one that has shown me how much they truly loved me all along.

One of the biggest ways my parents showed their love for me was in teaching me good values in life such as in how to handle money. They taught me how to use a checkbook, how to save money, and how to never spend more than I had, including the notion that I shouldn’t ever place purchases on a credit card unless I could pay it off by the end of the month. And I wholeheartedly believe it’s because of this guidance that I’ve never been in debt my entire life thus far and that indeed is definitely something to be grateful for.

Some other good values they taught me that I have gratitude with was always holding the door for others, always saying thank you for the things people did for me, and always offering blessings at meal times, which brings me to an even greater thing to be grateful for when it comes to them, as I never went without food, water, or shelter during my entire upbringing. In fact, we always had quite the abundance when it came to those things. An abundance that even allowed us to frequently dine out, to go on many-a-vacation to nice places, and to experience much of the finer things in life that the world had to offer starting from a very young age.

My parents also supported my athleticism and made sure to always attend my swim meets and other sporting events to cheer me on. They supported each of my achievements in them as well, so much so that they even created a trophy wall for all my awards.

On the same level, they taught me the value of hard work and persistence can and will bring about any desired achievements sought, like it did for me in my many sporting events. Which on some level, having that hard work drive is the very reason why I’ve been able to keep this blog up after so many years, why I’ve been able to keep working on healing holistically even through all the pain I’ve faced, and why I’ve kept seeking God through faith every single day even when I’ve felt God be totally silent with me for long periods of time.

Regardless, I think the most important thing overall that I have to be grateful for when it comes to my parents is that it’s they who taught me initially about God. I used to read the Bible with my father and often witnessed the power of God through his actions. And it was my mother who became the backbone in our family that made sure we always thanked God for what we had and who taught me the importance of prayer.

Ultimately, I think it’s this very connection to God they led me to that’s helping me nowadays to remember so many things to be grateful for when it comes to them.  From our Friday pizza nights, to taking long road trips, to enjoying our rest stop lunches along the way, to taking hikes into the wilderness, to day trips into New York City, to playing cards and board games on rainy days, to singing Christmas songs while playing the piano during the holidays, to having movie nights with gourmet crackers and cheeses, to making whirlpools in our swimming pool, and well I could go on and on about the many things I have found gratitude for with my parents.

I’m so thankful to have as much gratitude as I do with my parents these days and I can’t wait to see them again just to thank them for how much they did for me. In the meantime, though, I wait with gratitude, gratitude for two parents that even through all their drama were able to show their son an incredible amount of unconditional love on a daily basis.

I look forward to the day when I can give my Mom and Dad a huge hug again, but for now, I’m just glad I have many grateful memories of their unconditional love and a Higher Power they paved the way towards, who’s helping me to keep going and who’s keeping a watching eye over me until then….

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Welcome to another chapter of Grateful Heart Monday where I start my week off with one piece of gratitude, which for today is for my best friend Cedric from Massachusetts.

Many years ago, in the fall of 1997 actually, I met Cedric in the rooms of recovery. I wasn’t very serious about my recovery then even though he was, yet he always saw the best in me anyway and I so admired that part of him, as much as I admired many other parts of his unique personality as well.

You see, Cedric is one of those rare people in the world who just lights up any room he enters. He radiates joy more than not and has a deep booming laughter that will make you want to laugh right along with him too. He is one of the most spiritual, Christ-loving individuals I’ve ever met as well, which are just some of the many reasons why I was so drawn to get to know him in the first place so long ago now.

But even more important and probably the thing that makes me the most grateful for Cedric is that he’s never given up on me, even when I’ve given up on myself time and time again. He stuck around and remained my friend, even when I acted extremely selfish and self-centered for great lengths of time. While some would say that Cedric was crazy for sticking by my side through all he endured, but really that’s just Cedric, someone you can always count on and someone who never gives up on anyone.

Our friendship has definitely gone through a series of iterations over the years, but it’s always survived each of our ups and downs because Cedric is one of those people who practices unconditional love and forgiveness and does his very best to always see his part in any division.

Honestly, if it wasn’t for Cedric, I’d never have found my way into recovery whatsoever, as it was he who took my call when I finally had enough of living the dry drunk life back in September of 2007. It was during that call he invited me to attend his home group in West Bridgewater, Massachusetts, which became the catalyst to changing the rest of my life from one of just surviving and staying sober to one of living an actual life of recovery.

In recent years, my list of things to grateful for with Cedric continues to grow because he’s shown how loyal of a friend he is, even with my health being as bad as it’s been. While many who maintain they’re my friend have distanced themselves from me, Cedric hasn’t and instead, has reminded me time and time again that even if he was just sitting in the same room as me, that it would be enough and would still mean the world to him. Which for me is the surest sign of a true friend that I can think of, someone who never abandons you, even when the going gets rough and stays rough for an extremely long period.

I absolutely love my weekly conversations with Cedric when we connect over the phone, because he’s someone who knows how to tap into the Spirit and uplift me no matter how bad my day might be. We usually talk a few times a week and there have been plenty of those conversations where I’ve been more down than not. Yet that never seems to dissuade Cedric whatsoever, from continuing to draw closer, and I think much of that is due to the level of faith he has in God.

Sometimes I feel like it’s his faith alone that helps to keep me going, especially on those days and weeks when my health issues are relentless. And when they are, something I cherish about Cedric is how he’s always opened to praying with you no matter where you are and in any given moment. His prayers are not only deeply caring and connecting but tend to consistently feel like they’re specifically tailored for you from his heart.

That’s why I’ve always felt like Cedric would make a great pastor and I hope someday that may actually come true, because I fully believe that his good nature, his unconditional love for all human beings, and his desire to serve God wholeheartedly, will make for an incredible foundation for a church to grow from.

The bottom line is that after 20 years of friendship, I am still finding more and more ways to be appreciate Cedric. He is an amazing son of God and someone I owe much of my life to. So, thank you Cedric, for just being you, as you have led me and I’m sure plenty of others to have bountiful amounts of gratitude when they think of you…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Welcome to Grateful Heart Monday, where I write about a single piece of gratitude I have in my life, so that I may start my week off on a positive note, which for today is dedicated to all those who took the time a week ago today to wish me a happy 46^th birthday and 23 years of sobriety from alcohol and drugs.

It’s amazing to think I’m 46 years old now to be perfectly honest, as it’s difficult to fathom how all those years have already gone by. Even more amazing to ponder is that I’ve been sober from booze and pills now for exactly half of those years as well. But, the most amazing thing that happened on a day where I always turn a year older and continue to increase my length of sobriety, were the amount of people who actually took the time to wish me a special one.

So, to the couple hundred who reached out on social media, to the many who sent messages via texts, and to all those who called on that day, I am so very grateful.

In light of that, it’s led me to wonder if the amount of people who reach out each year to wish me a special day is directly proportional somehow to my recovery work and my relationship with God. What I mean by that is how my work with both has moved my life quite a bit from a selfish and self-centered existence to more of a selfless and giving one, which in turn, seems to have led to more and more people every year to connect with me when June 11^throlls around again. And while I know it’s important to have gratitude if even just one person was to remember my birthday and sobriety anniversary, it’s pretty awesome to see how many reached out this year and I feel it must be related to God and my recovery work. Because frankly, it wasn’t all too long ago when I was hard pressed to have anyone remember me on June 11^th, unless it was from someone I was sleeping with or from a concerned family member.

So, as my phone beeped and dinged and rang throughout the day a week ago and as I took the time to thank each and every individual who was thinking of me on yet another birthday and sober anniversary, I ultimately found an immense amount of gratitude to not only each of them, but to God as well for reminding me when I most needed it, that I do matter…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson