Category: Words From My Inner Child Andy

A teacher saw a student crawling into class one day, and asked why he was doing that.

The boy said, “Because class has already started and you warned us not to dare WALK into class if we were late!”

Hi everybody, it’s your favorite person Andy, back for another day of writing! I hope you liked my little chuckle for the day, as I know I did. Anyways, Mr. Poopy Pants (that’s Andrew if you didn’t know who I’m talking about) took today off from writing another one of his thought-provoking (in other words, boring) blog articles. Clearly I’m the head honcho today and I have another neat idea to write about, which deals with the topic of asking questions. My Mom always said I asked them about everything from the time I popped out of her womb (which is totally gross by the way), but isn’t that just the nature of being a curious kid? So today I’m going to write a bunch of ones I still have in life, which I decided to title, “Why is it that…?”

Why is it that God never speaks to me directly with a voice?

Why is it that I never seem to be able to reach the end of any rainbow?

Why is it that parents think screaming and yelling at a kid will help make them learn something better?

Why is it that so many churches say that everyone is welcomed when they keep turning people away?

Why is it that there is a Fathers Day and a Mothers Day but no Kids Day?

Why is it that movie theaters won’t give me a discount if I bring in my own 3D glasses?

Why is it that the movie previews these days have to give away so darn much of the movie?

Why is it that parents think hitting a kid is ok when they wouldn’t want to be hit themselves?

Why is it that people start wars and do hateful things to each other all in the name of God when God is only supposed to be about peace and love?

Why is it that so many grown-ups never take the time to have fun and play (and no, I’m not talking about that icky bedroom kind either! LOL.)?

And…

Why is it that Andrew Arthur Dawson has to obsess so much about his yard that he goes outside multiple times each day with a vacuum to suck up every single leaf that falls on it? (Sorry Andrew but I was just dying to tell everyone this! 🙂 )

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

I tend to think that kids like me are often way more grateful for even the smallest of things as compared to how most adults usually aren’t. And yes, in case you’re wondering, it’s Andy writing again for Andrew today mostly because he’s been a little Mr. Cranky Pants lately. So I decided it would probably be a good thing to talk about some of the gratitude I have, as hopefully that might help improve some of his mood. So…

I’m grateful to God for my eyesight because I’m able to see all the beauty up in the sky and down here on the Earth.

I’m grateful to God for my ears because I’m able to hear all the noises in nature, including the funny ones animals make like my cat Driggs.

I’m grateful to God for my tongue because I love to taste so many weird combinations of foods like peanut butter and bacon sandwiches and blue cheese dressing on just about everything.

I’m grateful to God for Andrew’s partner Chris because he’s a lot of fun to hang around each time he brings out his little kid.

I’m grateful to God for helping Andrew stop all his addictions because he totally listens to me now when I really have a want or need.

I’m grateful to God for people like Bill Murray, Jim Carey, Ellen DeGeneres and even Andrew’s sponsee George because they each have the gift of making people laugh, which is something I kind of think we all need to do a lot more of in life these days.

I’m grateful to God for my arms and hands because I like using them to play jokes on people such as tapping someone on their opposite shoulder, doing bunny ears over their head, making a circular finger gesture just to see if they stare at it, or even just needling them in their side.

I’m grateful to God for Andrew’s spiritual teacher Manin because she actually was the one who led him to spend more time with me in the first place.

I’m grateful to God for creating ice cream and pizza because I love them so much and I think I could probably eat them every day for the rest of my life.

I’m grateful to God for people like Jym Shipman because he spends a lot of time with his little kid too, which I call Jimmy, and he also creates a pretty cool comic strip named “Diamond In The Rough”.

And…

I’m grateful to God for knowing just how much Andrew Arthur Dawson has healed because there’s only a short time left before we’ll finally be back playing basketball, going bowling, hiking and biking, and doing a lot more fun activities with each other.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Cows!

Cows who?

Cows go “moo!” not “who” silly, get it right! J

Ok, if you haven’t figured it out already, it’s me Andy writing this today. Yeah! Hopefully all of you reading this don’t mind me writing on here once a week because I really like doing it. But if you don’t, then I’m rubber and you’re glue, and whatever you think of my writing just bounces off of me and will stick to you! LOL!

Anyways, today I decided to write a little something on the topic of wishing. You see I love wishing and most kids like me usually do as well. Somewhere along the line though all you adults out there seem to forget doing kids things like this. Heck, Andrew did for the longest time, but I’m happy to say he’s getting a lot better these days, even though he’s still a fartwad sometimes. J Well before I get in trouble let me share with you what I wanted to today and that’s titled “I Wish I Could…”

I wish I could make people tell me the exact truth when I ask them any question, no matter what that question ever is.

I wish I could make everyone be nice to each other all the time, especially when they’re driving as all that road rage kind of scares me.

I wish I could be some type of a sea creature that could swim to the deepest parts of the ocean floor just to see what is down there.

I wish I could permanently eliminate meatloaf from every lunch and dinner menu on the planet because you all know already what I really think about it. (Yes, even yours Caryn… LOL J)

I wish I could make everyone spend at least an hour a day having fun with their inner child, as it’s truly an important key for everyone’s happiness.

I wish I could create a universal translator that would help me communicate with anyone in this world because not knowing someone’s language can be such a barrier sometimes.

I wish I could make every public bathroom be a private stall because I find it really creepy when someone has to pee next to me.

I wish I could have a magical object that could allow me to pass through any television or movie screen and suddenly be transported into whatever I was watching.

I wish I could play a few more games of Gin Rummy with my mother because that’s when I always felt the closest to her.

I wish I could take one more hike with my father up a really large mountain and have a picnic lunch with him at the top because that’s when I always felt the closest to him.

And…

I wish I could convince Andrew Arthur Dawson to go a lot easier on himself and not take things so seriously because I think he’d feel a lot better if he did.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson