Category: Words To Live By

Have you ever been around someone who always seems to complain about everyone in their life and finds something wrong with each of them? If so, have you noticed how those individuals also seem to always place the blame for the problems they have in their life on everyone else but themselves? The sad thing about all of those individuals who are like this is that they expect the world has to change before their life will get better. Ironically though, the one person that truly needs to change to make this happen is the one person they’re not complaining about or placing the blame on, and that’s themselves.

Mahatma Gandhi once summed this up quite perfectly when he said “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.”

Unfortunately, I spent much of my entire life doing the exact opposite.

I once loved to criticize almost everyone I spent time with. It was a common thing for me to get angry about something they were doing. I’d often tell myself that my life would be so much better if they would just change certain aspects of themselves. But what I never realized is that each of those aspects I was wanting those people to change were the things I most needed to change within myself. Each of those people I was hoping would change were only being a mirror for me to take a deeper look into myself, except the reality was that I didn’t want to.

The best image I can conjure up of when someone becomes like this in their life is to think of a person crossing their arms, frowning, and pointing their finger in a disciplinary way at everyone else. The real truth in this image is that their finger needs to be pointing at only one person and that’s back at themselves. I’ve learned over the years that any anger or frustration I feel towards anyone is something I still have work to do around within myself. For years, I avoided that work though. I really just wanted the world to change to make my life feel better. But as Gandhi inferred, it really doesn’t work that way. Waiting around for the world to change only left me in a constant state of irritation and feeling let down.

I felt that way frequently in so many of my closest relationships where I kept telling myself that things would get better if only they would change “this” or “that” part of themselves. Years were shed off my life waiting around for those changes to happen with each of them. They never came though and basically I became blinded from seeing the real truth in that I wasn’t changing either. As when I really started focusing on making spiritual changes in my life, I began to grow apart from most of those relationships. That’s only because I started seeing how each of them were unhealthy for me. It’s when I started observing how those relationships were nothing more than two unhealthy people choosing to stay with each other and remain toxic. The more I worked on changing, the more I grew apart from each of them. The less I worked on changing myself, the more I became afraid to leave them and instead focused on the changes I felt they needed to do.

Thank God, this isn’t the case anymore as my levels of anger and frustration with others are so much less today. I believe that’s much in part due to all the work I’ve done within myself to change and grow spiritually. I don’t maintain relationships with people anymore who aren’t willing to put forth the effort to change. To put in more precisely, I don’t want to be around anyone anymore who constantly complains about others or blames others for their misery in life. Doing either is really just their way of shifting the focus off of the fact that they don’t want to put forth the hard work and effort it takes to change to see their world become a better place.

For all those years I didn’t want to see that truth, I lost friends because they were changing and I wasn’t. And as I said a minute ago, I also stayed in relationships that were toxic and only became more sick because of it. Even worse, I fell in addictions to deal with my stubbornness to change. It eventually became a very lonely place to be in and that’s what forced me one day to look in the mirror and say maybe I need to change.

The bottom line is this. When everyone else is gone from your life and you have no one else to complain about or place the blame on, I encourage you to take a moment, breathe, and glance into any mirror. It’s in there you will see the person you really are complaining about, who is most deserving of your blame. As it’s you who is the one that needs to start making some serious changes in your life. I can promise you though once you start doing so, that much healthier people will begin gravitating back into your life and you’ll also begin seeing the world around you a whole lot better too…

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

Yesterday I spoke about the people who frequently leave their trash behind in public places, such as at movie theaters, with an expectation that someone else will clean up after them. Today, I want to discuss a related subject about the people who purposely litter directly in the environment.

Littering is a big problem, especially in the United States. I’m sure you’ve seen it happening at least once, and most likely even more then that, around you at some point in time. Or maybe you’ve even done it yourself here and there thinking it’s not really that big of a deal for the rare times you have. Well here are 10 interesting facts you may not know about when it comes to the downsides of littering:

1. Over 800 Americans are killed each year in litter-attributed motor vehicle accidents.
2. It takes 50-60 years for an aluminum can to decompose, 450-1000 years for a plastic bottle, 20-1000 years for a plastic bag, 2-10 years for cigarette butts, and ironically, it even takes up to 2 years for orange peels and banana skins to decompose.
3. Litter strewn areas actually lead others to want to litter even more in those areas.
4. Many small animals crawl into bottles or jars getting stuck in the process and slowly starve to death. They also get caught in those plastic shopping bags, six pack rings, and old fishing lines and then they can’t get away from danger or they suffocate. And every year, millions of animals die this way.
5. Many plants and areas abundant with natural vegetation are destroyed each year due to the toxicity created by litter.
6. Litter removal costs almost 10 percent of district budgets statewide and usually is in the amount of millions. This only leads back to us with higher taxes and more money coming out of our pockets.
7. Close to 20 percent of roadside litter is actually recyclable.
8. Many cigarette butts thrown out car windows lead to roadside brush fires and wildfires.
9. Much of the toxic litter gets consumed into crops and livestock on farms that eventually makes its way to our tables to consume.
10. Spitting chewing gum out of our mouths into anywhere in the environment is a major health issue because of the bacteria contained in it, as well as the chemicals needed to remove it off the roads and sidewalks where it lands. Gum is also not biodegradable and animals often mistake it for food where death can occur from them trying to digest it.

I’ve always been curious as to why people purposely litter, even when they know at least a few of these facts. Through my Internet research, I was able to discover the number one reason why is that people are too lazy and can’t be bothered to find a trash receptacle. Some other reasons included the lack of environmental education, not having a sense of pride in their community, or being raised in families who littered themselves.

Doing all of this research into littering has truly opened my eyes quite a bit. I’ve seen how even some of my own past actions can change now. It saddened me to realize that my former gum spitting habits and fruit remains disposals out my car window could have caused great harm in a world I’m trying very hard to create more love and light in. Educating myself on this topic has definitely changed my perception completely. Choosing to repeat these actions now would be unspiritual and just plain ignorant on my part.

I’m really glad I did the research on the litter problem in our country. It helped me out tremendously and it’s my hope that it will help educate others as well. But the education factor is only the beginning. Changing one’s littering behaviors is obviously the next step. And maybe even more importantly than this is something else we can all do, that my Higher Power showed me will help to reduce the litter problem in our country…The next time you see any litter on the ground nearby, try picking it up and bringing it to the nearest trash bin. You’ll be surprised on how much this actually ends up influencing others who observe this to start looking at their own behaviors and do the same. Maybe then our litter problem will start to drastically reduce in our country…

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

I have a few pet peeves in my life when it comes to things I see occurring in everyday life when I’m out and about. One of them deals specifically with something I’ve observed happening quite a bit lately. It’s when people don’t throw away their trash and expect someone else to do it.

It baffles me on why it’s so difficult for any individual to not discard their trash in a receptacle after they’re done with it. The most notorious place I see this happening is actually at the movie theater. When the lights come on at the end of a movie and people are scurrying out of their seats to leave the theater, I always see the many empty bags of popcorn, soda cups, and cardboard trays strewn across the seats everywhere. This constantly has made me wonder what people are really thinking when they leave their waste behind. My guess has always been that they’ve felt entitled to doing it. I have further fathomed that most probably make the assumption that they are paying for some staff person to clean up their mess because of their movie ticket purchase. While on some sense the money from a movie ticket might actually be paying for the employees of a theater to do their work, isn’t it really just a common courtesy to take our trash to the nearest garbage bin?

I’m not sure if it’s the lack of common courtesy or just plain ignorance that causes people to leave their trash behind, but I sure am grateful that I’m one of those who doesn’t practice this behavior. I have to thank my family for teaching me good values such as this one. They always taught me to put myself in the shoes of those people who end up having to clean up the trash left behind in those public places like a movie theater. That led me to thinking about how frustrated I would be if I was having to do that job and it’s become a great motivating force for me to consistently pick up my own trash no matter where I am now.

Sadly, it’s not just at the movie theaters I see this behavior happening either. It’s in the parking lots outside convenience stores where people are leaving their empty bottles, cigarette packs, and old scratch tickets on the ground. It’s in the fast food establishments where people are leaving their trays, dirty napkins, and wrappers behind on the tables. It’s in the public washrooms where people are leaving their used paper hand towels on the bathroom floors. And it’s even in the recovery meetings I attend where I see people leaving behind their empty drink bottles and coffee cups on the floors below their seats.

Why do so many people do this? I truly wish I had the answer. The only thing I know I can keep doing to deal with this problem is to continue taking the action to clean up after myself. So no matter where I am, I always make sure to take my trash to the nearest receptacle. Often, I even pick up other’s people trash left behind and discard it as well. It really isn’t that hard to take an extra second or two to discard our trash, and someone else’s for that matter, in a nearby bin. Thinking someone else is being paid to do that job is definitely lacking in common courtesy and isn’t it really just being plain ignorant in doing so?

The next time you find yourself about to leave your trash behind in any public place, I encourage you to take a moment, breathe, and try to picture yourself having to clean up your mess and everyone else’s too. Hopefully now you might reconsider doing this action ever again and instead start having the common courtesy to throw away your waste like those of us who do…

Peace, Love, Light, and Joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson