I’m Not Better Than Or Morally Superior To Anyone…

If there’s one thing I know, it’s that I don’t think I’m better than anyone else, nor do I think I’m morally superior to anyone either. Yet, those are the very accusations that have occasionally been said of me, some to my face, and some behind my back. What is true though is that I do feel far more humbled in life with what’s taken place over the past eight and half years.

Sadly, there was a time though where I used to allow my ego to make me believe I was better than others and morally superior, even knowing deep down I truly wasn’t. But, now I feel like I’m on the exact opposite side of the spectrum due to the many knock-downs and knock-outs I’ve had to endure ranging from financial failure, to an inability to work, to my many health issues, and a number of other things as well.

Life has truly humbled me, yet there are still people out there who feel I place myself above others. Frankly, I’m amazed at that because in recent years, I’ve felt more worthless in this world than anything else, which I’ve talked about a number of times in some of my other blog articles.

Nevertheless, while I may not participate in a number of things that the rest of society does with regularity, that doesn’t make me better than someone else or morally superior. It simply is me following my own inner guidance and doing my best to continue beating to my own spiritual drum, even when the masses try to often convince me to do otherwise. Look, I don’t expect anyone will ever fully understand me, as much as I’m just as sure that no matter what I say or do, I’ll continue to be misinterpreted, especially here in my daily musings.

In all honesty, my only reality I have right now is to keep on surviving in a world that feels totally out of control to me, to keep on surviving the health issues that still plague me within, and to have faith that there is a Higher Power who will guide me through it all. And while my deepest truth is that I don’t feel like I measure up in this world these days and feel as if I have nothing to offer anyone anymore, I am very thankful I don’t allow my ego to try to convince me otherwise like it used to.

So, please, if you ever find yourself at some point judging another to be acting better than you or morally superior, I encourage you to take a moment, breathe, and realize it may be quite far from the real truth. The filters you are looking through in your accusation could be biased from what’s actually reality, as it truly is in my case, where humility has become my only existence…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Getting Fully Honest And Back In Integrity, When I Really Wasn’t…

I wrote recently about how important having integrity is for me, given I used to be out of integrity more than not. And after writing about the subject, I realized there was still one person I wasn’t fully in integrity with, and in fact was on some level even being slightly dishonest with.

The person I’m speaking of is someone I’m in a spiritual men’s group with, that is not religious or 12-Step based. There, we practice living a life of integrity and honesty with each other and yet, I wasn’t fully doing that.

This all started over two months ago when this group member asked me to check out a new business he was becoming a part of, essentially one of those companies that you might consider to be “pyramid-based”. While I’ve actually worked for one for of those in my past and was courted by several others, it’s never been my forte. Yet, because of a character defect I’m still working on, one that revolves around people-pleasing those I find attractive, I told him I was interested, when I really wasn’t.

The real truth was that I just wanted to hang out with him as a friend and nothing more, yet this character defect of mine that used to rule my life led me to think the only way I could spend time with this person would be to express interest in what they were so passionate about.

So often in my past, I fell prey to this behavior, getting drawn into things like Harley Davidson’s, ultra-conservative churches, and even guns, none of which ultimately interest me on any level. Yet, because I people-pleased those I found attractive, I involved myself in things I loathed.

Thankfully, my Spirit lets me know rather quickly these days when I’m not living in integrity and am being dishonest on any level, which led me to have a meal a few days ago with this men’s group member. There, the first thing I did was get honest by telling him all of the above, which not only led to a much closer connection that was based more on Spirit than self, it also helped me to feel a lot better about myself and living closely to the ideals I speak of.

So, trust me when I saw that it’s not worth people-pleasing anyone, especially if it’s something you truly don’t want to do or be a part of, because in the end you will not only come to despise yourself and your actions, you might also come to a place where you resent something or someone as well, including yourself.

I’m just glad God is guiding my life now to get me so rapidly back into integrity and honesty in my life, because those are two qualities that are a must for me on the spiritual journey I’m trying to live on…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

 

Beating To My Own Drum…

Recently, I received quite a bit of flak from people who read my article about not voting in this recent election. Instead of grasping the underlying purpose of that article, I was chastised immensely for my action. So, rather than accepting me for my individuality and appreciating that I was beating to my own drum, I got criticized…A LOT.

Why don’t people understand that this is exactly the problem in our world right now? Everyone is pointing the finger at everyone else and judging everyone else, rather than looking in the mirror at where they can change, get healthier, and grow spiritually. And as they continue to do that, they also get totally uncomfortable when those around them do something completely against the grain of society, even if it doesn’t directly affect them. I should know given the number of things I’ve done over the years to better myself and got put down in the process.

The fact is, I don’t want to be like everyone else. I don’t want to fit in to some societal norm. I like beating to my own drum and forging a path that I feel my heart and soul is guiding me on, or better yet, my Higher Power is guiding me on. But sadly, far too many can’t deal with that, and my actions end up challenging their beliefs enough so, that I get judged rather than accepted for just being me.

Every day I read on Facebook tons of opinions from people, some of which I agree with and some of which I don’t. For those I agree with, I may or may not comment. But for those I don’t, I never comment. Because commenting with my own judgment is not allowing someone to beat to their own drum. It’s essentially putting them down instead for their beliefs.

Our world could be a far more loving, caring, kind, and considerate place, if people would just allow people to beat to their own drums. While beating to my own drum generally never affects another individual directly, the noise it creates still seems to bother them, noise that challenges their personal belief systems and accepted values.

Take the idea that I believe God is ok with homosexuality so long as I remain in a monogamous, loving, relationship and abstain from any promiscuity is one great example that I constantly have received flak on.

And with this latest non-voting decision that I also received quite a bit of flak with, my truth is I’m still ok with that decision and I stand by it.

Besides the fact that I feel our current political system is completely unstable and corrupt no matter who seems to get voted into office these days, a more important truth is that I feel real change can only come from within, by beating to my own drum, and by allowing others to do so as well.

I honestly feel that if we all allowed each other to beat to our own drums by letting everyone be individuals who can make decisions that may or may not be ones we personally would make, our world will become the very thing we keep striving outside of ourselves to achieve, but keep failing to get there because of it…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson