Month: July 2013

Turbo Charged!

I’ve been on such a movie kick lately seeing quite a number of films at the theater. For me it’s one of the things that summer’s all about anyway. So two nights ago I went to see “Turbo” at the local cinema given that I’m a big animation fan. What’s funny is how this film, like several other films I’ve seen recently, was so closely connected to some of my own life’s experiences.

The film’s plot is actually rather simple. It’s about a snail who has a big dream to go as fast as an Indy race car. All the other snails that live around him laugh at his absurdity and just go on with their daily lives doing what they always do, which is to harvest and eat tomatoes. Due to a freak accident that happens on a venture away from home one night though, the snail is doused in a bath of nitrous oxide when it’s sucked into the engine of a car that’s street racing. When the snail is thrown from that engine, it’s not to long after that he realizes he’s able to travel at speeds upwards of 200 mph and gives himself the nickname Turbo. The rest of the movie is focused on him trying to achieve his dream of being an Indy race car driver when every other snail, including his own brother, still thinks he’s insane and does their best to convince him otherwise.

What I relate most to this plot is the path I’ve been taking these past few years of my life to heal. That path began a few years ago when I made the decision to fully walk away from an addictive lifestyle and start spending most of my time in solitude to try to grow closer to God and to myself. In doing so, my physical body deteriorated and most of my days became filled with vast amounts of mental and emotional anguish. For awhile, I tried to take medications to deal with all the pain and I followed all the doctor’s advice who I saw, none of which helped me in the least bit. Then came the day where I walked away from all those pills and appointments and accepted the only way I was going to heal was to live my life as healthy and spiritual as a human could and that God would help me complete the rest. Like Turbo, I have often thought way bigger than what everyone else around me thinks. Many have thought I’m crazy and that God isn’t going to ever heal me. People have tried to convince me all the time that I should go back on medications or that I have some disease which just hasn’t been discovered yet by the doctors I once visited. Others have told me to just accept I’m always going to be dealing with the pain and make the best of it. But I continue to believe differently than all of them.

Turbo never gave up on his dream and neither will I. He eventually experienced the fruits of his hard work and I know I will too. I refuse to believe that what I’m feeling right now is the best it’s ever going to get for me. So each day now I do my best to trust inherently in God that I will be delivered out of this suffering and restored to a healthy state of mind, body, and soul by remaining patient and continuing to do the hard work I do each day to heal. I leave the rest in God’s hands and truly believe that through all of this, God will eventually turbo charge me too…

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

The Way Way Back To Being Yourself

During May to September, so many movies are released that cost millions and millions of dollars to make. They are usually filled with tons of special effects or are sequels that people have been waiting to see for a long time. “Summer Popcorn Flicks” is a nickname that is often given to any of them. But occasionally, a gem of a movie is released during these months that stands apart all on its own where it hasn’t operated off of a large budget, where its actors are either unknown or have taken pay cuts to be in it, where special effects don’t really matter, and where the storyline of the movie is really its only heart and soul. “The Way Way Back” is an example of such a movie that not only allowed me to really connect to the main focal point of the movie, which was about a shy and lonely boy named Duncan who was trying to find himself, it also helped me to remember my own journey to doing so.

In this movie, Duncan was a wallflower. He didn’t stand out as anything special to anyone around him. Most would probably label him as a nerd or a dork in their minds and no one was giving him the time of day. Everyone close to him was either generally ignoring him and focusing on their own selfish needs and wants or they were making fun of him in subtle ways. At the age of 14, Duncan was presented as this extremely withdrawn kid that ironically was no different than who I was at his age. Thankfully, he went on in the movie over the course of a few summer months to find redemption in his lonely life when both a pretty teenage neighbor girl and a cool manager of a water park took interest and showed him just how special he was in his own way. Unfortunately, it took me a lot longer in life to get there.

There are a lot of people out there who may never fit the “cool bill”. People often point and laugh at them, like they even did in this movie with not only Duncan, but also the kid next door who had a severely lazy eye. They get passed over in gym class when teams are being picked, they are excluded from many group activities, and when people are told to pair up with another person for some exercise, they are usually left by themselves only to be paired up with the adult who’s coordinating it. Like Duncan was, many of those kids find their only company is the music they listen to in their headphones, the walks or bike rides they take on their own, or the books they read, because at least in all those cases, no one is picking on them, putting them down, or outright ignoring them.

In the movie, Duncan’s redemption came at a water park where its manager believed in him so much that he gave him the ability to find himself by offering him a job there. Sadly, no one ever came into my life that gave me that chance and for years, I tried to find myself through being a chameleon or following what everyone else was doing just so I didn’t stand apart. While that prevented me from being picked on a lot less, it also impeded any progress to ever finding out who I really was inside.

Last summer, by the time I turned the age of 40, I had already made the decision it was time to stop following everyone else. It was then that I actually felt as if I stepped back in time to where I was still that innocent and nerdy 14 year old boy no different than Duncan. But instead of going down those paths that I did at a young age to fit in, I went back to those activities that once brought me great comfort such as listening to music, reading, and sitting on the beach alone. What’s funny is that in doing that, God has brought into my life a few people who like that shy and lonely nerdy boy that I’ve become again. What’s even better is that I’m ok with it now too.

“The Way, Way Back” movie was a great portrayal of an accelerated version of something that took me almost three decades to do. I connected with Duncan’s life so well as it reminded me of a time when I wished my family, or anyone for that matter, had paid attention to me. Today, I don’t seek that because it’s already there in the way it’s supposed to be. I’ve seen that in being myself, those that are meant to be in my life are there and really enjoy being with me, and those that passed me over for whatever reason, aren’t.

Today I’m finding that some of the most interesting people are those who are often overlooked by society. They usually have the most interesting and heartwarming stories to tell and also the greatest capacities for sharing love. Duncan is an example of one of those people and so am I. There was nothing ever wrong with Duncan or myself back at that young age even though we both stood apart from most everyone else. While it wasn’t a water park manager who helped me to figure that out, God did and because of that, I’ve been able to find “the way way back” to being myself again.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

Dare To Dream

One of the greatest gifts any of us are given is the ability to dream. The dreaming I am referring to is actually not the one that happens when we are asleep, it’s the one that can occur in any given waking moment. And it’s the one where the mind, body, and soul unite together solely for the purpose of visioning something truly special that each of us individually strives for in our future.

Children do this all the time…

I want to grow up and be a fireman.

I want to grow up and be a doctor.

I want to grow up and be a policeman.

I want to grow up and be a pro athlete.

I want to grow up and be the next President.

Somewhere along the line though, many of those children become adults and forget about their childhood dreams of things they once envisioned for themselves. They settle into jobs and relationships that only bring them temporary satisfaction, and all too often, more misery in life. That’s only because deep down within each of their souls is a bigger dream desired in life. Unfortunately, most never pursue them ever again and instead choose to remain uncomfortably comfortable throughout the rest of their life. Some choose to numb themselves from those distant memories of a life once thought about by falling into any number of addictions. Others accept it as the cards they were dealt. And then there are those who will say that they’re too old or too poor or have too little time to ever try to pursue any of those dreams once thought about.

I honestly can’t remember what my childhood dreams were for my future. I think that’s because I grew up in an environment that didn’t fully allow me to think completely outside the box. Along the way, I ended up becoming a businessman and following a career that was really a lot more like what my parents wanted me to pursue than probably what my inner self wanted. For years I went from job to job and relationship to relationship seeking more satisfaction. But even when I got that, it only lasted for a short period of time and always felt as if something was still missing. Today, I believe what was missing was my heart and soul in all of what I was doing and a closer relationship to God.

Through all the healing work I’ve been doing on myself, I have thought a lot about the inner child who still lives within me and what he wants to dream about for the rest of the time I have in this life. The Shaman I am a student under recently asked me to start visualizing that by writing down some things I want God to guide me towards as I continue to heal and spiritually grow.

The following is a list, in no particular order, of those things my inner child and I have started dreaming about of a future I am working towards with God at the helm. I wrote each of them with the phrase “I will” solely for the fact that it’s putting myself in a greater place of empowerment and manifestation in life.

1. I will be physically healthy and well enough again to fully play golf, basketball, bowling, and tennis, as well as to hike, bike, and jog.

2. I will be employed in a career that I look forward to going to when I wake up each day.

3. I will be earning a living doing something that is also helping make this world a more loving place.

4. I will be married to my current partner and strive in that relationship to help create a society that embraces same sex relationships rather than tear them down using religious viewpoints.

5. I will be a prominent author who is represented by a well known publishing company that also books speaking engagements to talk about what I’ve written.

6. I will be a spiritual motivational speaker around the world that talks about all the things I’ve gone through and healed from including addiction, codependency, racism and prejudice, bullying, growing up in a broken home, and more.

7. I will be meditating into deeper and longer states.

8. I will develop all the spiritual gifts that were blessed within me in this life.

9. I will be living in a climate that is more warmer than colder year round and have a house there on some body of water where I can sit out on a deck in peace and serenity.

10. I will be a beacon of hope, light, and love that naturally inspires others to find their own path to God.

There are plenty of other things I’m sure I could come up with that are also dreams for my future. But the most important thing is that I’m allowing myself to dream again and not numbing myself anymore from thinking about them. I believe that with God guiding my life, all of them and then some are possible.

I encourage each of you to take a moment today, breathe, and dare to dream again in your life by writing a few of your own aspirations down like I just did. Ask God to guide you life path towards achieving all of them. What do you have to lose other than the few moments of your time that it takes to write them out and say a quick prayer over them???

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

One of the greatest gifts any of us are given is the ability to dream. The dreaming I am referring to is actually not the one that happens when we are asleep, it’s the one that can occur in any given waking moment. And it’s the one where the mind, body, and soul unite together solely for the purpose of visioning something truly special that each of us individually strives for in our future.

Children do this all the time…

I want to grow up and be a fireman.

I want to grow up and be a doctor.

I want to grow up and be a policeman.

I want to grow up and be a pro athlete.

I want to grow up and be the next President.

Somewhere along the line though, many of those children become adults and forget about their childhood dreams of things they once envisioned for themselves. They settle into jobs and relationships that only bring them temporary satisfaction, and all too often, more misery in life. That’s only because deep down within each of their souls is a bigger dream desired in life. Unfortunately, most never pursue them ever again and instead choose to remain uncomfortably comfortable throughout the rest of their life. Some choose to numb themselves from those distant memories of a life once thought about by falling into any number of addictions. Others accept it as the cards they were dealt. And then there are those who will say that they’re too old or too poor or have too little time to ever try to pursue any of those dreams once thought about.

I honestly can’t remember what my childhood dreams were for my future. I think that’s because I grew up in an environment that didn’t fully allow me to think completely outside the box. Along the way, I ended up becoming a businessman and following a career that was really a lot more like what my parents wanted me to pursue than probably what my inner self wanted. For years I went from job to job and relationship to relationship seeking more satisfaction. But even when I got that, it only lasted for a short period of time and always felt as if something was still missing. Today, I believe what was missing was my heart and soul in all of what I was doing and a closer relationship to God.

Through all the healing work I’ve been doing on myself, I have thought a lot about the inner child who still lives within me and what he wants to dream about for the rest of the time I have in this life. The Shaman I am a student under recently asked me to start visualizing that by writing down some things I want God to guide me towards as I continue to heal and spiritually grow.

The following is a list, in no particular order, of those things my inner child and I have started dreaming about of a future I am working towards with God at the helm. I wrote each of them with the phrase “I will” solely for the fact that it’s putting myself in a greater place of empowerment and manifestation in life.

1. I will be physically healthy and well enough again to fully play golf, basketball, bowling, and tennis, as well as to hike, bike, and jog.

2. I will be employed in a career that I look forward to going to when I wake up each day.

3. I will be earning a living doing something that is also helping make this world a more loving place.

4. I will be married to my current partner and strive in that relationship to help create a society that embraces same sex relationships rather than tear them down using religious viewpoints.

5. I will be a prominent author who is represented by a well known publishing company that also books speaking engagements to talk about what I’ve written.

6. I will be a spiritual motivational speaker around the world that talks about all the things I’ve gone through and healed from including addiction, codependency, racism and prejudice, bullying, growing up in a broken home, and more.

7. I will be meditating into deeper and longer states.

8. I will develop all the spiritual gifts that were blessed within me in this life.

9. I will be living in a climate that is more warmer than colder year round and have a house there on some body of water where I can sit out on a deck in peace and serenity.

10. I will be a beacon of hope, light, and love that naturally inspires others to find their own path to God.

There are plenty of other things I’m sure I could come up with that are also dreams for my future. But the most important thing is that I’m allowing myself to dream again and not numbing myself anymore from thinking about them. I believe that with God guiding my life, all of them and then some are possible.

I encourage each of you to take a moment today, breathe, and dare to dream again in your life by writing a few of your own aspirations down like I just did. Ask God to guide you life path towards achieving all of them. What do you have to lose other than the few moments of your time that it takes to write them out and say a quick prayer over them???

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson