Silly Joke #1
A man and woman were having marriage problems, and decided to end their union after a very short time together. After a most brief attempt to reconcile, the couple went to court to finalize their break-up. The judge asked the husband, “What has brought you to this point, where you are not able to keep this marriage together?” The husband said, “In the six weeks we’ve been together, we haven’t been able to agree on one thing.” The wife said, “It’s been seven weeks, not six!!!”
Silly Joke #2
After the baby was born, the panicked Japanese father went to see the obstetrician. “Doctor,” he said, “I don’t mind telling you, but I’m a little upset because my daughter has red hair. She can’t possibly be mine.” “Nonsense,” the doctor said. “Even though you and your wife both have black hair, one of your ancestors may have contributed red hair to the gene pool.” “It isn’t possible,” the man insisted. “We’re from pure Asian descent!” “Well,” said the doctor, “let me ask you this. How often do you have sex?” The man seemed ashamed. “I’ve been working very hard for the past year. We only made love once or twice a month. The doctor then responds confidently, “There you have it, it’s just rust!”
Silly Joke #3
An old blind cowboy wanders into an all-girl biker bar by mistake…He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a shot of Jack Daniels. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, ‘Hey, you wanna hear a really good blonde joke?’ The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, ‘Before you tell that joke, Cowboy, I think it is only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things: The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat. The bouncer is a blonde girl with a ‘Billy-Club’. I’m a 6-foot tall, 175-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.‘ Now, think about it seriously, Cowboy… Do you still wanna tell that blonde joke?’ The blind cowboy thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, ‘No…not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times!’
Bonus Silly Joke
A bicycle rolls into the doctor’s office. It says, “Doc, you gotta help me! I can’t keep from yawning all day long!!” The doctor says, “Well, I’m going to go out a limb here and say I think it’s because you’re too tired…”
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
