Daily Reflection

“You will get there when you are meant to and not one moment sooner… so relax, breath, and be patient.” (Mandy Hale)

I was cleaning my partner’s car one morning and hit the button on his key fab to open the trunk only to watch it rise so incredibly slowly. I tried to push the tailgate upward to make it go faster, but to no avail. After cleaning the area where the trunk met the bumper, I hit the button once again, only to watch it descend just as slowly. Once more I tried to make the process go faster, but again to no avail, when suddenly I realized how much this was just like my life.

How many times have I tried to rush things along that seemed to be progressing ever so slowly? And how many times have I ever gotten much success from those forced efforts to speed things up?

Very little, if any at all…

Because things in life like the healing I’m going through I’ve learned truly have their own cycle of time and require nothing more than patience, something I’ve struggled with immensely throughout my life. Maybe everything in life happens when it’s meant to and not one moment sooner, and any efforts we make to change this reality are only going to stress our minds and bodies out. So, maybe it’s time I focus more on relaxing, breathing, and working on being a little more patient while it all unfolds exactly as it’s meant to?

Dear God, I know I’ve been quite impatient throughout my life, especially as of late when it comes to my health and healing. I thank You for all the lessons I continue to learn when it comes to the art of patience, like the one that came through something as simple as a slowly moving automated tailgate…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Daily Reflection

“Don’t judge a book by its cover ‘til you’ve read the book.” (Jamie Lee Curtis)

I came home late one evening recently to find my freshly manicured yard I had left earlier in the day now strewn with leaves, branches, and a bunch of other debris. It was obvious a quick, but heavy storm had passed on through. Although it was dark outside, I opted to walk around it for about thirty minutes with a bucket and a flashlight to pick up all the remnants that the winds had left behind when suddenly one of my neighbors who was drinking quite heavily on his front porch loudly criticized what I was doing and told me it was pretty ridiculous.

It’s in moments like this where the decision to respond can either come from a Higher Place or a much lower one. Thankfully, my work in recovery from addiction helped me to choose the former. When I told him that it wasn’t too long ago that alcohol and drugs and a number of other addictions had ruled my life, where all of my energy would have been invested at times just like then in nothing but those very things, solely because of all the memories I used to hide from that included my father’s suicide and mother’s tragic drunken fall down the stairs, he immediately apologized, not once, but multiple times, and said he was sorry for judging me. Even though he had been very inebriated, the truth I shared from my Spirit had been enough to cross the threshold of his numbed state and reach his heart.

Most people don’t understand any of my OCD-based actions whatsoever. They don’t comprehend things like keeping my yard and gardens so neat and orderly because they don’t know me and haven’t read my entire book, one that is a hard read, yet one that will make far more sense to my actions they deem as crazy, once they have. As then they truly will be able to grasp how much healthier it is for me to focus late night energy into cleaning up my yard, instead of drinking or drugging or numbing myself into oblivion with anything else I was once addicted to, solely to calm any negative memories from my past.

It’s easy to judge a book by its cover, yet until you’ve read the whole story, you have no idea what someone has been through and aren’t ever going to be able to fully understand…

Dear God, I know I’ve been guilty of judging others by what I’ve seen without really knowing. Help me the next time I find myself doing this, to remember not to judge a book by its cover and maybe instead choose to start reading more into the entire story.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Daily Reflection

“For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me.” (Matthew 25:35)

“When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting…” (Matthew 6:16-18)

A few week ago, I decided to fast for three straight days where I ate no food whatsoever and only drank pure water. At first, my decision to do this was solely motivated by the fact that I had been rather gluttonous over the previous few weeks and was beginning to feel the consequences of that. Yet, I decided on the day I began this fast that I wanted to use the time for a deeper meaning and purpose. You see, my entire life I’ve been provided for by God when it comes to food, and all the other basic necessities as well for that matter. But with food being so critical for sustaining life and with billions of people on this planet, many even right here in Toledo, all going without and starving every single day, I decided to use those 72 hours to think about them. Frankly, I wanted to feel what it might be like to live a day in their shoes by going hungry.

At first, it wasn’t so bad, as that first 24 hours felt more like a cleansing. I did everything I normally would that day including my ritual bathing, doing my chores in and around the house, attending my men’s group, and working with my sponsees in recovery. It wasn’t until the second day though that I really started feeling what it might actually feel like to live a day in the life of someone who goes without food on a regular basis, as it was the second day that I had to cut the grass and do a ton of yard work, which just so happened to also be an exceptionally hot day. And while the water did quench the amount of sweat that poured out of me that day, I must have burned through several thousand calories in the process. So that aching in the stomach that comes from hunger pains? Well, it became so incredibly strong the rest of that day that I really began feeling irritable, cranky, light-headed and weak. But, I did my best to hide that from the rest of the world while I went on with my daily activities including running the 12 Step meeting I put on at one of the local crisis centers. As I sat there in that meeting that night, my stomach squeezed into itself and actually hurt quite a bit from how hungry I was. Yet, I pushed on through and continued drinking nothing but water and by the end of that 2nd day of fasting, it was then I truly found a much higher level of compassion for all those who regularly go without food. How do they go through this every single day I wondered? It was that thought that I carried through my final 24 hours of fasting and in the end, after losing close to seven pounds, it made me seriously reflect on the billion or so people on this planet who are severely undernourished.

The fact is, hunger is a very real problem on this planet still and I often think far too many of us take for granted our own cupboards, refrigerators, and freezers always being stocked with so many things to consume when countless people are going without even a single cup of rice in a day. I’m thankful I had such a strong reminder of that during this 3-day fast and will definitely remember this the next time I find myself complaining about being hungry…

Lord, thank you for always providing me plenty when it comes to food and for helping to remind me during my 72-hour fast what it might feel to live in the shoes of those who go without it on a regular basis. Please forgive me for any ignorance I’ve had in the past when it comes to the world hunger problem and I pray for guidance on how I can make more of a difference with this global epidemic.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson