Category: Words To Live By

Do you sometimes wonder where you are on your own spiritual journey? It’s a question I often ask myself, which a friend helped me to answer a little better by sending me the following short parable of sorts. It’s a small excerpt taken from Max Lucado’s 1985 book titled On The Anvil.

“In the shop of a blacksmith, there are three types of tools.

There are tools on the junk pile: outdated, broken, dull, rusty.  They sit in the cobwebbed corner, useless to their master, oblivious to their calling.

There are tools on the anvil: melted down, molten hot, moldable, changeable. They lie on the anvil, being shaped by their master, accepting their calling.

There are tools of usefulness: sharpened, primed, defined, mobile. They lie ready in the blacksmith’s tool chest, available to their master, fulfilling their calling.

Some people lie useless: lives broken, talents wasting, fires quenched, dreams dashed. They are tossed in with the scrap iron, in desperate need of repair, with no notion of purpose.

Others lie on the anvil:  hearts open, hungry to change, wounds healing, vision clearing.  They welcome the painful pounding of the blacksmith’s hammer, longing to be rebuilt, begging to be called.

Others lie in their Master’s hands:  well tuned, non-compromising, polished, productive. They respond to their Master’s forearm, demanding nothing, surrendering all.

We are all somewhere in the blacksmith’s shop. We are either on the scrap pile, in the master’s hand, in the tool-chest – or being pounded and reshaped, on the anvil.”

I wish I could definitely say I was completely useful and in my Higher Power’s hands at the present time, in a state of being totally sharpened, primed, defined, and mobile. But I’m not, at least not yet that is. What I can unquestionably state though is that I’m not on some junk pile either where I’m nothing more than a tool that’s outdated, broken, dull or rusty. Those days are hopefully long gone, as back then my life was useless solely because I riddled it with so many addictions. It took a lot of pain, anguish and despair to pull me out of that discarded heap and place me on the anvil, and that’s where I believe I still remain now.

While being on the anvil may not be the most pleasant place to reside, I truly do look forward to becoming whatever tool of usefulness my Higher Power has been forging me into. In the meantime, my heart remains as open and hungry to change as can be and my old wounds and past transgressions continue to heal as well. Soon that veil which has been over my eyes for far too long will finally be fully lifted. And when it does, I know I’ll have become a very unique spiritual tool who’s ready to fully serve my Higher Power and who’s well tuned, non-compromising, polished and productive.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

Can you name at least 3 things you love about yourself? This is a question so many I meet have trouble answering. But in all honesty, a few years ago I wouldn’t have been able to answer it either because back then I really wasn’t loving myself much at all, or any part of the life I was living. Thankfully, that’s no longer the case and coming up with at least three things I love about me is actually a good exercise in practicing more self-love.

I find the most important thing I love about myself nowadays is that I’m not engaging in ANY addiction to make myself feel better. Up until the beginning of 2012, I had at least one of them ruling my life on just about every level. What that meant for me was how almost every one of my thoughts, words, and actions were focused on how to feed that addiction. These past two years I’ve forced myself to walk through many bouts of pain and fear without one single addictive numbing agent to curb any of it. While it hasn’t been easy, it has helped me to love myself a lot greater.

The second thing I’m finding I love about myself these days is how I do my best to look for the positive in everything. There were several decades of my life though when that wasn’t true and where my world was only consumed with negativity and stinking thinking. Then, I saw every glass as perpetually half empty instead of half full. And while my life still has plenty of frustrating moments, I am choosing to look at each of them now as spiritual lessons I can grow through rather than a pit of quicksand that’s dragging me under.

The third thing I love about myself today that I think is definitely worth mentioning is how I’m not allowing unacceptable behaviors in my life anymore nor am I allowing anyone to disrespect me either. The reality is that I used to let far too many come into my life and walk all over me. I also used to let way too many use me and abuse me too. I love myself enough now not to allow anyone like this to remain a part of my life at all. Where codependence once ruled my life with vast numbers of these unhealthy individuals, independence and freedom from that bondage have taken their place.

These three things are really but a drop in the bucket of the growing list of things I love about myself these days. Some of the others worth at least mentioning are my devotion to living at a higher vibration, the growing compassion I feel for everyone on the planet, and the respect and care I have for my inner child. It truly seems as if the more I dedicate my life to my Higher Power, the greater things I discover I love about myself. So hopefully after reading this simple exercise in self-love you might take some time now to ask yourself the very same question…

Can you name at least 3 things you love about yourself?

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

What qualities do you look for in a person when dating? What are the things you want to see in a person you hope to eventually have a full-fledged relationship with? These questions often pose great difficulty for many when asked and how each person answers them is usually quite unique. In my case, it took almost 40 years to figure out that my answers to them were directly proportional to where my spirituality was.

When I first met my partner online several years ago, my spirituality had grown enough to recognize that what is inside someone is far more important than what is on the outside. But several decades ago, that was so far from my reality.

Back then when I first became clean and sober from alcohol, drugs, and cigarettes, the only dating quality I actually looked for was in someone’s physical appearance. Not much would alter from that over the course of the next decade with the only exception being that I made sure not to date an active smoker, alcoholic or a drug addict. But qualities such as what one’s spiritual beliefs were, how they treated others, and how they spent their free time didn’t really matter to me mostly because I was so focused on the sexual component of a relationship. What’s interesting to note though is that I didn’t fully know what my own spiritual beliefs were nor did I generally treat others well at all for most of that time. I also spent most of that time period on the Internet looking at porn or at the most risqué pictures of personal ads. So I think it’s completely true when people say that we are only capable of successfully dating those who mirror the qualities we have within our own selves at any moment in time. And for the longest time, that’s solely why my biggest concern and quality sought for in another to go out with was how hot they looked to me.

It wasn’t until 2007 when I began working on my recovery with the 12 Steps did any of the qualities I sought for in a mate change. At first it was a pretty rocky road because my carnal desires consistently seemed to win out. But as time progressed with the spiritual work I did on myself, I noticed the more I became healthier within, the more I looked for healthier qualities within another to date. Thus the more I improved my relationship to my Higher Power, the more I looked for that in a potential partner. The more I began treating people with the love and respect they deserved, the more I looked for that in another as well. And when I finally stopped engaging in sex and love addiction based behaviors, I found I no longer was attracted to those who were still engaging in any of them.

Unfortunately, when I met my current partner online towards the end of 2011, I wasn’t totally free from the grips of my sex and love addiction yet. Ironically, unbeknown to me at the time, neither was he. But as I continued to be diligent on living spiritually and as close to my Higher Power as possible, I freed myself from all of those toxic behaviors and my partner’s indiscretions finally came to light. Since then, the two of us have been walking a much brighter spiritual path together. Nowadays I find the main quality I look for in him rests at a much higher vibration as compared to what I once looked for long ago.

So while I may have been extremely shallow for the longest of time by only focusing in on how someone fit my physical type, the main quality I care most about these days in a person I want to spend my life with is the amount of love and light they emanate from within. I think the only reason why that is comes right on down to the fact that’s what I work the most on within myself as well. I’m grateful that both my partner and I continue to place great importance on this aspect within each of our own selves, as I believe the spiritual success and longevity of our relationship truly depends upon it.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson