It always saddens me when I see people leave poor tips in restaurants when they are dining out. I’ve come to learn over the years with eating out quite often in so many various establishments, that most waiters and waitresses depend upon the tips given to them to earn their living. In our country, most wait staff receive only a few dollars an hour for just showing up to do their jobs. The rest is up to how many customers show up and how much they get in their tips.
All too often in my dinners out and about with friends and acquaintances, I’ve silently observed how people will make an assumption that for anything which goes wrong during their meal, that it’s the waiter or waitress’s fault. So in all those cases where foods don’t come out the way they’re ordered, or when they are prepared poorly, or when they don’t taste that good, or when they takes a long time to get to the table, it’s usually reflected in the server’s tip by these same people. But ironically, I’ve found it’s often the kitchen that is making many of these mistakes. And sadly, the kitchen is not the one that suffers the consequences from that poor tip. It’s the waiter or waitress that does, even though it frequently wasn’t even their fault.
There are cases too when the wait staff in a restaurant is grossly shorthanded. That can occur when people don’t show up for work or for the times when crowds are surging more than what the wait staff is set up to handle. I’ve dined at restaurants where these conditions have occurred and it really is not a reflection upon the waiter or waitress in those situations when the dining experience is not done to a level that my ego might think it should be.
The bottom line here is that the first person people tend to blame in a restaurant for anything that goes wrong during their dining experience is the waiter or waitress, when in fact, that’s often not the case. It’s the ego that makes that assumption and because of it, the tip that’s left to them is usually lousy. And that’s completely unfair to these waiters or waitresses who may have done their absolute best to make the meal experience the best it could be.
I think about this all the time now when I dine out and do my best today to always tip at least 20 percent of the total bill regardless of how bad my meal experience was. Even if it really came down to the fact that the waiter or waitress was truly the problem, I always tell myself I don’t know what’s going on in those people’s lives. Maybe they’re new to being a food server. Maybe their boss at that restaurant is constantly yelling at them for no reason. Maybe they’ve just had a serious blow in their lives such as someone close to them dying, or their health is deteriorating, or someone just ended a relationship with them. Regardless of whatever the circumstance is, doesn’t each of them warrant my compassion? Don’t I want others to have that same compassion for me if there comes a time when I’m not performing up to my par?
The next time you find yourself dining out and are about to leave your tip, I encourage each of you to take a moment, breathe, and try to be more generous to your waiter or waitress with the tip you are about to leave them. Even if your meal didn’t meet your ego’s expectations, it’s often not the wait staff’s fault and in those cases where it truly might have been, you never know what’s really going on in your server’s life that may warrant your love and compassion instead of your stinginess. Please also try to remember that the tip you’re about to leave your server is the sole source of their income. Think what it may be like for you if your job didn’t give you your paycheck because they felt you didn’t quite live up to their expectations. Hopefully now, you’ll want to leave your server that 20 percent or even greater…
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson