16,945 hours. That’s roughly the amount of time I spent 100% engaging in some type of an addiction so far in this lifetime. It’s equivalent to approximately two solid years of my life that I completely lost, of which I can never get back. And sadly, that’s just what addictions do. They rob a person of living their life to its fullest extent and experiencing each of those precious moments it has to offer.
It’s truly hard to think about the amount of things I skipped out on during those 16,945 hours where I instead placed alcohol, drugs, sex, some love obsession, or codependent friendship as more of a priority. The following are just some of the many things I’ve come to realize in recovery that I totally lost in the previous years of my life, from 2012 on backwards, due to engrossing myself in so many addictions:
- Attending funerals for loved ones
- Attending weddings for loved ones
- Attending family get-togethers
- Watching and playing with my nephews in their single digit years
- Being there for my sister when she needed me
- Being there for friends when they needed me
- Being there for partners when they needed me
- Partaking in game nights
- Partaking in holiday party get-togethers
- Spending time hiking and being one with nature
- Playing sports
- Going on vacations
- Going on retreats
- Attending picnics and various socials
- Going on bike outings
- Taking road trips to numerous places
- Taking part in mini-golf outings
- Attending pool parties
- Attending conventions
- Attending spiritual lectures and classes
I know I could definitely go on with an endless list of many more wonderful things that life has to offer, each of which I missed out on because of being too wrapped up in some addiction. Life is so short already and yet for at least 16,945 hours of my own, I chose to skip out on one thing after another so that I could instead get drunk, high, have sex with someone I didn’t really care about, chase after someone I was lusting over, or spend time with someone I didn’t really want to out of codependency.
Thank God I’m not wasting any more hours of my life nowadays engaging in any addiction.
Thank God I’m not missing out on what life has to offer anymore either.
The time I lost to addictions can never be brought back, so I thank God for making the decision to never let any more of it slip away ever again…
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson