Month: August 2021

Grateful Heart Monday

Welcome to another Grateful Heart Monday, where gratitude remains the only focus of my writing at the start of each week, which for today is for my next-door neighbor Veronica and the small tokens of thanks she’s given me for the work I continue to do in her yard.

It’s been well established that I’m quite anal retentive when it comes to my own yard and gardens. For the most part, I really do enjoy the hard work I put into making it look as inviting as it seems to be for others. Most people probably don’t know though that I also maintain the front yards on either side of my home as well. On my left, I began doing that when the health of its owner went downhill a few years ago. On my right, I started doing it just a few months back after learning the tenant, that being Veronica, was working double shifts, going through a difficult break-up, and struggling with depression through it all. Because I have a lot of free time, I decided to help her out like I have been with my other neighbor. My only hope was that her seeing a tidy and well-manicured yard after the long days she puts in would brighten her spirit. As I’ve continued to maintain it, along with my other neighbor, as well as my own, I’ve been grateful just for the feeling it’s given me doing something selfless for others.

Sometimes, my selflessness has brought me small tokens of thanks from others. Last fall for example, when cleaning up a good majority of our entire street from all the leaves and debris before a huge storm came in, a neighbor gave me a little money, while another gave me a huge box of high-quality garbage bags after I had used all my own for the job. Honestly, I never expect anything from any of the work I do like this. After all, it’s something I’m doing just to help make life easier for others. Twice now though, that help has come back in small tokens of thanks from Veronica who gave me $40 on one occasion and a $50 gift card to Starbucks on another. And I was extremely grateful for it.

Ultimately, I’ve learned in life how important it is to do selfless work through my 12 Step recovery program. Giving away part of myself for the benefit of others, asking nothing in return, has been an incredible joy in my life and a stronghold for keeping sober. In my recovery world, that’s translated to me sponsoring others, running meetings, volunteering at local addiction recovery centers, and providing alcohol and drug education to both nursing and Greek students from the University of Toledo. Outside of that realm, it’s also translated to me helping out both of my neighbors by doing my best to make their front yards look very welcoming.

While I have never expected any gift or anything really from any of the selfless work I’ve done, it’s always a true blessing and joy to receive one when I do. So, thank you Veronica for saying thanks in a special way. It brightened my day, as much as my work in your front yard has seemed to brighten yours. I’m grateful to You today for thinking of me and I dedicate today’s Grateful Heart Monday to you…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Thought For The Day

Quote #1

“Until he has unconditional and unbiased love for all beings, man will not find peace.” (Buddha)

Quote #2

“I will never withhold my love from you, regardless of the circumstance. I will always love you.” (Jesus)

Quote #3

“You will not enter paradise until you have faith. And you will not complete your faith until you love one another.” (Muhammad)

Bonus Quote

“Buddha was not a Buddhist. Jesus was not a Christian. Muhammad was not a Muslim. They were Teachers who taught unconditional love. Unconditional love was their religion.” (Unknown)

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

“So, Are You Vaccinated Yet?”

On a very hot summer day recently, my partner Chris and I were lazily lounging and enjoying the peace and quiet in the outdoor pool at the YMCA we are a member of when suddenly, a woman approached us in the water and began loudly expressing her extreme displeasure of all unvaccinated people in our country. She had no idea I was unvaccinated nor knew of any of my health issues that have led to why I haven’t gotten one yet. I cringed as she continued to talk at a level where most around the pool could hear. When she said that all unvaccinated people need to be rounded up and sent somewhere outside our country where they can all die, I had enough. I was close to saying something that I knew I’d probably regret, which is why I quickly exited the pool. I’ve learned that sometimes it’s just best to keep my voice silent and pray for the person, because some people are just looking for an argument and there’s nothing that can be said to them where they might find greater understanding, love, and connection, especially when one of the first questions out of their mouth is, “So, are you vaccinated yet?”

The world lately seems to be filled with many people like this. How many times have I overheard people from both sides of this issue expressing their strong opinions for anyone to hear? Too many. Frankly, it’s got me so frustrated, because if I wasn’t going through all the health issues I have been for as long as I have, I’d already have gotten a vaccination, just like I did in my earlier years of life. Regardless, I’m so weary of these vaccination arguments and discussions, with people sending me article after article surrounding the science on this virus, the constant fighting and bickering on this subject, and the near-constant drama of pro-vaxxers versus anti-vaxxers. Last year was all about pro-Biden versus pro-Trump, of which I couldn’t escape no matter where I was. Now it’s all about this virus and I keep on seeing the fallout from it with friends walking away from each other, pointing fingers, and placing the blame on why they think this virus is still around.

I experienced some of this with a dear friend just recently. At the end of this month, I’m heading to the Washington, D.C. area to reconnect with several friends I haven’t seen in over 10 years. When one of them I spoke to over the phone asked me before our call ended, “So, are you vaccinated yet?”, I wanted to lie, but I’m not a liar. Yet, I knew where this was going to go at that point, but I remained honest and said I hadn’t been yet and explained why. It didn’t matter though. Even though I was willing to wear a mask, remain at a healthy distance, and even get a COVID test just to help them feel safe, they didn’t want to see me at all, even after 26 years of being the best of friends and even after not having seen me for well over a decade. I accepted their decision, but it hurt…A LOT.

The rejection from someone who’s been a part of my life for so long, all because of my unvaccinated status, made me wonder if that’s what happened back in the early 80’s with friends when HIV began spreading. Initially, it was called “GRID” or “Gay-Related Immune Deficiency” and anyone who was gay was chastised and blamed for the virus. Gay people became lepers in society, the total shame of the world. The news and the public in general pointed the finger solely at homosexuals and many stayed far away from them because of it, that is until science proved it was a sexually transmitted virus with both homosexuals and heterosexuals. Presently, science and the news continue to report the only reason why COVID is still a problem is due to all the unvaccinated people. Whether that’s 100% true or not doesn’t matter in my book, because like HIV, or when it was first known as GRID, each of those people who were gay were worthy and deserving of love then, just like all unvaccinated people are now.

Nevertheless, I’m afraid now to be in any type of public social setting, because it seems like that question of, “So, are you vaccinated yet?” continues to arise where the feeling I get each time it does is one of total repulsion from others when I answer it truthfully. It often feels like I’m getting the entire blame of the virus at that moment. I can’t imagine Jesus, Buddha, or Mohammad acting this way, given they were each about expressing unconditional love and acceptance of all. That’s why I am trying to emulate those qualities in my life as best as I can, regardless of whether someone has chosen to vaccinate or not, and regardless of any person’s stance on anything in life really, even if it’s something I stand completely differently on.

Ultimately, I just wish I wasn’t caught in the middle of this vaccination issue, but sadly, I am. But maybe that’s a good thing, for if it’s taught me one thing, it’s to love at a much Higher Level, one where it doesn’t matter whether someone has vaccinated or not, where instead what’s more important is loving someone no matter what, even the woman at the YMCA pool who wishes to banish people like me to another country where I can be left to die.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson