I used to think my mind and body functioned completely separate. Most of my life up until my 30’s were spent feeling that way. If I had bodily ailments, I told myself that they were just physical based and went to the doctor’s to deal with it. If I had mental or emotional ailments such as anxiety or depression, I went to a shrink to figure out why. What I never realized for the longest time was just how interconnected they both were to each other.
After my father’s suicide in 1996, I developed the symptoms of Fibromyaliga and attempted to treat it solely on a physical level. When nothing got better for me, someone suggested that I read a book named ‘The Mind Body Connection” by a Dr. John Sarno. After reading it, I started to have more acceptance in the concept that physical pains can come from mental and emotional imbalances. The author hypothesized that many of our physical pains originate in the mind and can go away if we focus in on finding and healing its mental and emotional causes. I found a practitioner who believed in this method of treatment and began to delve into my childhood life which was plagued with a family filled with alcoholism and mental disorders. I never wanted to face those issues nor talk about them to anyone during most of my my life up until then. The more that I walked through my father’s suicide and the dysfunctionality of my early family life, the less my body had those general aches and pains which came with Fibromyaliga.
Later, as I matured I stopped working on myself and started spending most of my time hanging out with an unhealthy crowd. My closest friends during that time were ones who were committing adultery, talking about sex more than not, getting drunk or high on alcohol or drugs, gossiping often, and prone to greed and gluttony. Over time, I became like them and eventually grew depressed and anxious again. Sadly, I didn’t listen to those symptoms as warning signs and continued to do the same toxic behaviors with those unhealthy friends. The Fibromyalgia symptoms returned except I didn’t take them as warning signs mostly because I was stubborn. When my body developed even worse levels of it, along with severe sciatica on my left side, and prostatitis, I finally listened and began to clean my act up. I removed all those toxic people out of my life and began a spiritual routine that I have continued doing so every day since. I also started going to therapy again and discussed what had driven me to a desire to even be with those types of people in the first place. Thankfully, that helped to reduce my mental and emotional pains. There are days that the physical pains have felt slightly less too and I know it’s only a matter of time before they go away completely. The key lesson though that I’ve learned in all of this is that the mind and body are truly connected to each other. I was sick mentally and emotionally and wasn’t doing anything about it. My body was smart enough to realize that. To get my attention, it created severe physical pains. The more that I have dealt with those things that initially caused my mental and emotional imbalances, the healthier I am getting in every single area of my life.
I’ve begun to see this mind body connection manifesting in others now as well. Recently, my partner shared with me that his sister had developed severe pain in one of her hips. She was extremely concerned and in tremendous pain. It had come on overnight and he had taken her to the doctor’s office for an emergency visit and evaluation. After getting some x-rays, her course of action was to get a prescription of painkillers and have bed rest. Unfortunately, none of it involved talking about those things that have been going on in her life lately such as the extremely codependent relationship she’s been in with someone who refuses to take care of himself. Or the fact that she had her husband leave her two years ago after two decades of marriage when he decided to come out of the closet. Instead of working through that pain, she jumped into one relationship after another to where she has stayed since. If you think about the hip, it’s primary function is to support a person. She’s been so concerned about supporting the people she dates and has not focused on supporting herself and working through any of her mental and emotional stressors. Somehow I think her mind is sending her physical body a message to get her attention that she needs to support herself.
Like her, it took a lot for my mind to get my attention. My pain had to become great enough before I was willing to shift my focus away from being with all those unhealthy people. When it did, I understood that the one person I hadn’t taken care of and needed to was me. I believe the same holds true for my partner’s sister who needs to focus all her attention on taking care of herself now. Hopefully she will listen to the message and not fall back into the same patterns. I have a good feeling her physical pain will begin to reduce if she does.
Physical bodies aren’t always sick just because they’re sick. People don’t just get anxious or depressed for no reason. Doctors often say in both cases they do. But I disagree. I have a much stronger relationship with God today who has been helping me to see just how closely interconnected the mind and body are to each other. My journey now is to keep doing what I need to stay healthy and do my best to stick with those who are doing the same.
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
