Silly Joke #1
Three boys are in the schoolyard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, “My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50.”
The second boy says, “That’s nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100.”
The third boy says, “I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon. And, it takes eight people to collect all the money!”
Silly Joke #2
A dietitian was once addressing a large audience in Chicago:
“The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks erode your stomach lining. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the long-term harm caused by the germs in our drinking water.
“But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all have eaten or will eat it. Can anyone here tell me what food it is that causes the most grief and suffering for years after eating it?”
A 75-year-old man in the front row stood up and said, “Wedding cake.”
Silly Joke #3
A little girl said, “Grandpa, can I sit on your lap?
“Why sure you can,” her grandfather replied.
As she sat on her grandfather’s lap she said, “Grandpa, are you able to make a sound like a frog?”
“A sound like a frog? Well, sure Grandpa can make a sound like a frog.”
The girl said, “Then grandpa, will you please, pretty please make a sound like a frog?!”
Perplexed, her grandfather said, “Sweetheart, why do you want me to make a sound like a frog so badly?”
And the little girl said, “Because Grandma said that when you croak, we’re going to Florida!”
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
