Silly Joke #1
A man walking along a California beach was deep in prayer. All of a sudden, he said out loud, “Lord, grant me one wish.”Suddenly the sky clouded above his head and in a booming voice, the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.” The man said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii, so I can drive over anytime I want to.” The Lord said, “Your request is very materialistic. Think of the logistics of that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of another wish. A wish you think would honor and glorify me.” The man thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, “Lord, I wish that I could understand women. I want to know how they feel inside, what they are thinking when they give me the silent treatment, why they cry, what they mean when they say ‘nothing,’ and how I can make a woman truly happy.” After a few minutes, God said, “You want two lanes or four on that bridge?”
Silly Joke #2
After waiting more than an hour and a half for her date, the young lady decided she’d been stood up. Exasperated, she changed from her dinner dress into pajamas and slippers, fixed some popcorn and resigned herself to an evening of TV. No sooner had she flopped down in front of the TV than her doorbell rang. There stood her date. Wanting to shift the attention off the fact of how late he was, he suddenly gasped, “I’m two hours late, and you’re still not ready?”
Silly Joke #3
All of Broomtown was a buzz because boy-broom and girl-broom were going to get married. Everyone felt certain that the bride-broom and the groom-broom would make a lovely couple.The night before the wedding, however, bride-broom told groom-broom that she was going to have a little wisk-broom. “But, how can that be?” wailed groom-broom, “We haven’t even swept together yet!”
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
