After posting a review of the Netflix remake of “The Boys In The Band” about a week or so ago, I received a number of heart-felt and very interesting comments from a number of readers. While I understand that the original film this remake was based upon was one of the earlier strongholds in the LGBTQ movement, it still made me cringe given how many of the same stereotypes that heterosexuals often place on the LGBTQ culture depicted in this film, continue to be depicted more than not in the entertainment industry today.
Case in point, I recently watched a second LGBTQ film shortly after watching “The Boys In The Band”. It was on Netflix and titled “The Prom”. It was about two lesbian girls attempting to go to their high school prom together and encountering massive resistance from the powers that be on the school board. While the depiction of this lesbian couple itself wasn’t laced with any strong stereotypes, the depiction of the prominent gay male character in the film, Barry Glickman, played by James Corden, sadly did and ultimately ruined the movie for me. Beyond the fact that Corden is a married heterosexual man in real life, his performance was so over-the-top flamboyant, that it honestly made me feel disgusted at the ongoing Hollywood portrayal of so many gay men.
Look, there are countless gay men in our world who you would never know are gay, who don’t act feminine, who don’t sashay when they walk, who don’t use overly strong hand gestures when they talk, who aren’t into drag, who aren’t into showtunes or Broadway, who like things like sports and cars, and do many other things as well that are the exact opposite of what the entertainment industry often portrays of them. Honestly, I rarely see any mainstream movies and television shows that depict average type of joes just like me.
If there’s one thing that truly upsets me the most that comes from all this constant stereotypical portrayal of the LGBTQ culture in the entertainment industry is whenever someone says to me, “I never would have guessed you are gay!” A close second to that would be when someone says to me, “Have you ever dressed up as a woman?” or “Do you like drag?”
Just because I was born being attracted to the same sex doesn’t mean I have to talk with a feminine lisp and like either dressing up in women’s clothing or watching other men do that at some type of bar! Sadly, those types of judgments ALWAYS seem to come from heterosexual men and women who have never had any gay friends and only know of what a gay person might be like by what they see portrayed in films and on television.
Thankfully, I have a number of friends today who really appreciate the fact that I am an average type of joe, who doesn’t come off as appearing gay, and doesn’t fit those typical LGBTQ stereotypes. While I know there are plenty of people out there who do fit those typical LGBTQ stereotypes regularly depicted in film and television, if only the entertainment industry might begin to focus more on average type of joes like me, maybe the world would stop thinking all gay men for example are like Nathan Lane’s or Robin William’s characters from The Birdcage.
And lastly, I need to also mention that while the entertainment industry tends to show many LGBTQ individuals as promiscuous and not caring whatsoever about having a relationship with God, there are plenty out there who do like to settle down, remain monogamous, and focus their life on their spirituality and having a closer relationship with God. While many, many years ago I did explore my sexuality a little too promiscuously and avoided God at the same time, today I am with a partner I’ve been monogamous with for almost nine years now and spend every day seeking a closer connection to God.
Why the entertainment industry must always place gay men in roles that are consistently floating them from one sexual act to another and never doing any sort of praying and spiritual work, I don’t know. For as much as the series “Queer As Folk” for example was groundbreaking in its own way for the LGBTQ movement, it also focused a little too much on promiscuity and led many to believe that there is nothing spiritually healthy that can ever exist amongst gay men. It’s precisely why I feel it took so long to get gay marriage approved for these constant stereotypical portrayals of gay individuals.
Nevertheless, I tend to avoid watching LGBTQ-centered films and tv shows these days mostly because far too many of them frequently depict these typical stereotypes that pigeon hole people like me into them when I am so far from being like them. Hopefully one day, there might be films and shows that regularly depict average type of joes just like me falling in love with another man, all while doing things like hanging out at NASCAR races for the thrill of loud car engines and high speeds, or watching football games, not because of men in tights, but for the thrill of the sport itself…
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
