Every year approximately one million people are dying from suicide. This equates to one of these happening at least every 40 seconds. Global suicide rates have increased 60 percent in the past 45 years and that percentage is only steadily increasing with each passing year. The sad reality for each and every person that becomes one of these statistics is the fact that this seemed to be the best and only choice left in their life. And unfortunately, my father was one of them (and I was almost too).
My father was truly a wonderful man who had a very loving and giving heart when he was alive. Regrettably, he also battled with bi-polar disorder through most of it, which is what eventually led him to become one of those 90 percent of people who die by suicide due to a mental illness. He was just one of too many people who grew seriously depressed in life and chose a path they couldn’t come back from. And sadly, this dead-end path is usually the result of their not seeking or finding the necessary help. In my father’s case, he often refused to seek any help at all, and even when he did, he wouldn’t stick with it. This caused him to continually deal with untreated depression, which is actually the number one cause for suicide in our world today. There were other reasons though why my father made the choice to take his own life besides genetics and untreated depression. What most people don’t realize is that when a person commits suicide, it’s usually the result of an accumulation of negative life experiences. The following is a list of just some of those that have led to serious depression and suicide like my father’s, where the first three shown were a major source of his.
– The death of a loved one.
– A divorce, separation, or breakup of a relationship.
– A serious loss, such as with a job, a house, or money.
– Losing custody of children, or feeling that a child custody decision is not fair.
– A grave or terminal illness, or serious accident.
– Chronic physical pain or intense emotional pain.
– Being victimized (domestic violence, rape, assault, etc).
– A loved one being victimized (child murder, child molestation, kidnapping, rape, assault, etc).
– Physical, sexual, or verbal abuse.
– Unresolved abuse (of any kind) from the past.
– Feeling trapped in a situation perceived as negative.
– Feeling a loss of hope, helpless or that things will never get better.
– Serious legal problems, such as incarceration or criminal prosecution.
– Feeling “taken advantage of”.
– Alcohol and drug abuse.
– Inability to deal with a perceived “humiliating” situation or “failure”.
– A feeling of not being accepted by family, friends, or society.
– Feeling like one has not lived up to their expectations of themselves or of another.
– Bullying.
– Low self-esteem.
This is by no means a complete list of all the things that can lead to someone becoming depressed and ultimately taking their own life. In my case, the closest I ever came to suicide was primarily due to my sexual addiction and the obsessive feelings I had developed for an extremely toxic and unhealthy man a few years ago. After one too many bouts of experiencing rejection from him, I entered my storage unit, closed its door to where my car was being stored, started it, and waited to die. Thankfully, God intervened and my story in life didn’t end as tragically as my father’s did.
While I have done a tremendous amount of work in my life to heal from my own mental illness, depression, and negative life situations; my father, and so many others, gave up before they really tried to find their own healing. Their deaths have only caused more pain in this world as it’s definitely true what they say, that those who hurt the most from a person’s suicide is all those they left behind. I spent years battling my own depression and thoughts of suicide because of my father’s death, but I’m grateful to God today for the fact that I have fully healed from it and can talk so openly about it now. I loved my father deeply, maybe even more so now with all this healing work I’ve done. I can only imagine how many souls his life could have touched for the better if he had gone that extra mile to finding his own healing and inner peace. While I can’t bring him back, it’s my hope in writing this, that I may prevent others from following in his footsteps.
So if you are someone out there right now who is depressed and considering suicide, please take a moment, breathe, and know that even though I may not know you, I love you. There is help out there, as I am a walking, breathing, and living example of that. Suicide is never the answer and your passing will only extinguish yet another one of God’s beautiful lights that exist here on Earth. Even though you might find that hard to believe right now, just know that it’s true. I believe in you and so does God, so please don’t give up, as your healing has already begun by you having just read all of these words…
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson