Are you a cheapskate? Do people think of you as stingy? I know I was, solely because so many used to tell me so. But there were other terms that might have fit better and “Freddy The Freeloader” would probably be my favorite.
Have you ever had someone in your life that would only seem to be available to go out and do something that cost money when you were paying?
That’s Freddy The Freeloader.
Have you ever noticed how that same person always has the money to do things for themselves though?
That’s Freddy The Freeloader.
Have you ever noticed how that person fails to ask if you want anything when they are going to get themselves something to eat or drink?
That’s Freddy The Freeloader.
Have you ever noticed how you can treat that same person to many coffees and meals but you have to ask to receive even one coffee or meal from them in return?
That’s Freddy The Freeloader. And all of these examples are how I lived my life for a very long time.
When I used to live paycheck to paycheck and didn’t have much money to my name, I hoarded what money I had. I rarely, if ever, took anyone out for anything. I justified that principle through my lack of money, even though I really did have enough to do small things here and there for others. Instead, I protected what money I had and used it solely on things for myself. But I sure was quick to allow others during those times to treat me to coffees, dinners, movies, and even vacations as soon as they said they would pay. I would graciously say thank you afterwards and then go right back to a state of stinginess. For the numerous times that people did things for me that cost them rather expensive amounts of money, I would always tell myself I didn’t have a few bucks to buy them a single thing.
I lived my life this way the whole time I survived paycheck to paycheck. Ironically though when I began to come into greater sums of money in my life, none of this behavior changed. I remained that Freddy The Freeloader character and still claimed that I didn’t have enough money on too many occasions. I continued to expect others to pay for me or I just wouldn’t go participate in things with others that cost me money. I remained cheap and rarely offered to treat anyone to anything and even if I did, there was usually an angle to it.
The worst part about me being the Freddy The Freeloader character was that I always had enough money to do what I wanted to do with it and I didn’t hide that fact. Many saw how I took myself out to the places I wanted to and even treated certain people to things because I was wanting things from them like sex or companionship. But the idea of me just doing something nice for someone without being asked and without any hidden agenda was next to nonexistent.
I’ve realized today that any money I have is really not my money, it’s my Higher Power’s money. When I die, none of that money is going to go with me wherever I go. While I do know it’s important to make sure my bills and monthly obligations are being paid, I try to share what money I have left over these days. I am trying more and more to ask God to guide me in my use of money for a better purpose. Sometimes it involves randomly treating friends and even strangers to things at various places. Sometimes it involves buying a gift for someone just for the sake of it. And sometimes it involves donating it for the greater good. What’s even more interesting is that the more I’ve done these things, the more my Higher Power seems to provide me the money I need to keep going. But all in all, I have done a lot to shed that Freddy The Freeloader image and I thank my Higher Power for that.
I truly hope you’re not a Freddy The Freeloader type of person like I once was. It only drives people away from wanting to be around you. I lost many friends because of being tight in all the wrong situations and places. So the next time you find yourself with a few dollars in your pocket, take a moment, breathe, and try to do something nice for someone else with it, without any hidden agenda, and without them having to ask you for it. Know in doing so that you’ll not only draw your friends in closer, but that you’ll also be taking one step into the Light and one more away from being the selfish and self-centered person that Freddy The Freeloader really is inside.
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson