Have you ever been asked to describe yourself in three words? Or better yet, have you ever asked someone else to describe you in the same way? I know I have on both counts and what’s interesting is how those words have continued to change the more I’ve grown spiritually.
Describing myself in three words has always been far easier to do than asking another to do it for me. In many of the job interviews I’ve had in years past, I frequently was asked to answer this question. Usually I responded with some words I know they wanted to hear such as “dedicated”, “thorough”, and “punctual”. While they were definitely true of my character at the time and on some level still are; they weren’t necessarily the ones that described me accurately. The ones that were probably more appropriate at the time were “needy”, “high-maintenance”, and “selfish”. Thankfully, that’s not who I am anymore. Since working on my 12 Step recovery, my life has changed greatly for the better. I see myself so much differently today and feel there are three better words I’d use to describe myself now. They are “spiritual”, “selfless”, and “passionate”.
“Spiritual” is because I look for that in everything in and around me today.
“Selfless” is because I do my best to place other’s needs ahead of my own now.
“Passionate” is because I put my all in everything I do no matter what it is nowadays.
On the flip side of the coin though is how others might describe me using only three words. Ironically, in all the years prior to me working the 12 Steps, the sad reality was those words were still the same of “needy”, “high-maintenance”, and “selfish”. Occasionally I might have also heard a few other words such as “drama” or “negative”. But rarely were any of them positive-based and for good reason, as I was a very addiction-prone and toxic person at the time. Gratefully, this seems to be drastically different now and what’s interesting to note is how the words I’m using to describe myself today are also the same ones that others are describing of me. Most will say now that I am “spiritual”, “selfless”, and “passionate” and I’m quite happy to hear that. It’s my hope that the three words others perceive of me are the same ones I’m doing my best to foster within me.
On a whim, I decided while writing this article that it would be interesting to ask my partner to honestly describe me in three of his own words. He responded with “articulate”, “spiritual”, and “determined”. I was thankful to hear two new descriptors of me, as each are positive qualities I’m also trying to develop within me these days.
I truly believe it’s a good exercise for each of us to occasionally describe ourselves in three words. But, I believe it’s just as important of an exercise to ask those who are closest to us to do it. It’s probably a safe bet to say that when they match up, that it really is who we are in a nutshell. But, if by some chance they don’t, it might be a good time to take a deeper look within and start to work with our Higher Power on developing the qualities we truly want to portray.
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson