There are still moments when I occasionally get caught up in seeing only the negative side of something. Sadly, that was about all I saw for the longest of time. But thankfully, my spiritual teacher helped me to shift that tide to being more positive over the past few years. Now I find myself doing an exercise whenever I find my thinking sliding even slightly back towards the negative. It’s really a simple one actually and the more I practice it, the more I’m able to keep myself on the positive side of things. All it entails is taking each negative comment that comes out of my mouth, finding something positive in it, and then verbalizing/writing it. Given how I’ve felt and been recently, I think this exercise is probably well overdue and is going to be a great way to practice having even more gratitude in life.
- I can’t believe how bad the pain in my left leg has felt lately.
- I am grateful that I still have my entire left leg and foot and can still stand and walk.
- I am tired of not feeling well enough to hold a paying job.
- I am grateful that I still have enough financial resources to get by until I can work again.
- It really bothers me that most of my former friends in Massachusetts never reach out.
- I am grateful for those friends in Massachusetts like Kim who still regularly contact me.
- It angers me that many of the people I called on Thanksgiving never returned my call.
- I am grateful for those who did contact me on Thanksgiving and wished me a happy one.
- I hardly get time to be with my partner because he’s so busy with his work and school.
- I am grateful I even have a partner who’s willing to provide for the majority of our household.
- Why does it have to take so long to heal and be rid of all my health issues?
- I am grateful for how much I’ve already healed and all the lessons in patience I’ve been learning along the way.
- Those freaking squirrels keep digging up the grass in my yard!
- I am grateful for all the areas of my yard that are still so lush and green.
- Ugh, the yard is full of leaves again; I’m so tired of picking them up!
- I am grateful for the meditation I get to practice each time I clear my yard of leaves.
- There always seems to be heavy traffic when I need to get somewhere by a certain time.
- I am grateful for being able to drive, for having a reliable car, and for these important reminders to take life a little more slowly.
- No one ever seems to call me and ask me to hang out with them!
- I am grateful for my partner and the few friends in recovery who do spend time with me.
And how about one more for good measure…
- My life seems pointless; I feel that God has totally abandoned me!!!
- I am grateful for each of my sponsees, my spiritual teacher, and my partner, as each are signs my life has meaning and God is still with me.
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
My first sponsor listened to me complain about how *nothing* was going right in my life, early on. He said, “Well, you’ve got two good legs!” I practically yelled back, “Big freakin’ deal! I had those when I was *drunk*!” He leaned over and said, “Well, if you drink again, I’ll break ’em both….”
Another sponsor was fond of reminding me that every so-called problem I had was the result of one of my blessings. He kept saying annoying, stupid stuff like, “If you hate having to buy tires for the car so much, why not just sell the car?”
It’s funny, seeing this post after a meeting on Christmas eve…someone suggested “gratitude” as a topic, and at least three people groaned and said, “Oh, God, I *knew* it was going to be a gratitude meeting!”
It was interesting, because I got to share last, and I told folks how I responded exactly as they did when I was new. The struggle back then was, I was looking for the backwards-country-music-song gratitude (where the girl comes back, the dog comes back, the truck comes back….). In those days (and, to be fair, occasionally today) it was all about what I didn’t have, and what I hoped to get back.
Today, the gratitude I have is for grace (things I have received as free gifts) and mercy (not getting what I deserved). One fellow in the meeting talked about this: “my one big fear is that one day, Satan will show up on the end of the bed and say, ‘Remember all the times you kept bleating for justice to be done? Well, today you get it – and everything you’ve ordered over the years, by every one of your actions, will be delivered to you tonight.”
I have been hit with waves of gratitude over the last few days – even as I have whined about work and my inability to connect with several people because of it. I’ve had gifts I couldn’t have asked for – relief for my brother-in-law, suffering with interminable migraines; a letter from jail from a fellow I did a 12-step call on; FB notes from a new guy; a preacher’s wife telling me that “…you guys make some KICK-ASS chocolate chip cookies!” Simple but beautiful affirmations, indeed.
I’m glad you had such a wonderful string of things happen positively the past few days. So where’s my chocolate chip cookies anyway? lol