Month: March 2020

Grateful Heart Monday

Welcome to my Grateful Heart Monday series, where a slice of gratitude kicks every week off in my blogging, which for today is for Ameer and Tyrone, two individuals I’ve known for a number of months now at the correctional facility my sponsee Michael and I conduct a weekly addiction recovery meeting at.

For over a year now, Michael and I have been holding an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting at the Toledo jail on Monday evenings for an hour. One thing we’ve noticed is how there’s always a new set of inmates at each of our meetings there, as the men’s floor we conduct them on isn’t normally a long-term holding unit. While many of the men there have shown interest in the path we’ve presented for recovery for their addictions, most have been honest in saying they weren’t ready to fully give their addictions up and only a few out of the hundreds we’ve met have actually contacted us after their release. Thankfully though, there has also been a handful of individuals who have been around for a while in this unit, who have continued to show up each and every week we’re there. Two such men are Ameer and Tyrone, both having attended our meetings since late October/early November of last year.

The enthusiasm these two have shown in our meetings has been overly exceptional. While many have struggled to pay attention or been outwardly negative about the 12 Step program, Ameer and Tyrone have not only practiced Step One diligently, but have also brought the three things needed to have a healthy recovery every week, that being honesty, open-mindedness, and willingness. They have consistently been excited for us to show up each week, shared from their hearts, and even helped others on the floor by starting a small recovery group themselves, essentially practicing Step Twelve in the process.

Sometimes those of us in recovery often wonder how much those we pass our experience, strength, and hope onto will actually get it and seek the recovery path themselves. With Ameer and Tyrone, I have no doubt they’ve gotten it and can only pray that they’ll continue doing the incredible job they’ve been doing with their sobriety from jail once they get released.

Something that should also be mentioned as well that’s brought me much gratitude with these two men is the blessing they gave Michael and I recently. They told us that our dedication to being there each week meant a lot to them, that we’ve made a very safe place for everyone to open up and talk about whatever they’ve needed to, including any addiction they’ve suffered from, and how thankful they’ve been for our compassion and unconditional love, as all of it had inspired them to become the recovering individuals they were rapidly becoming.

Honestly, it’s priceless gifts like this that keep me giving back to the 12 Step recovery world and why I love doing all the recovery work I do. I’m also thankful to God when I get strong reminders like this of the importance of this work in this world. Truly, I’d like to think that God orchestrated all this and is the very reason why Ameer and Tyrone have been in the unit we hold our meetings at for as long as they have. Because maybe God knew they not only were going to finally grasp a sober path in life through the work Michael and I were going to do with them, but also was going be precisely what led them onto the path of giving back themselves.

I pray I get to help more individuals like Ameer and Tyrone, two people who I’m definitely blessed to know, who most deservedly are worthy of today’s Grateful Heart Monday.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Thought For The Day

Quote #1

“If you have these two things – the willingness to change, and the acceptance of everything as it comes, you will have all you need to work with.” (Charlotte Selver)

Quote #2

“Change will not come if we wait for some other person, or if we wait for some other time. We are the ones we’ve been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.” (Barack Obama)

Quote #3

“Always go with the choice that scares you the most, because that’s the one that is going to help you grow.” (Caroline Myss)

Bonus Quote

“With humility comes the willingness to stop trying to control or change other people or life situations or events ostensibly ‘for their own good’. To be a committed spiritual seeker, it is necessary to relinquish the desire to be ‘right’ or of imaginary value to society. In fact, nobody’s ego or belief systems are of any value to society at all. The world is neither good nor bad nor defective, nor is it in need of help or modification because its appearance is only a projection of one’s mind. No such world exists.” (David R. Hawkins)

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Daily Reflection

“Progress is impossible without change. Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.” (George Bernard Shaw)

Ok. I admit it. I was totally stuck in the 80’s, or maybe the 90’s at best, with my clothing at least. Baggy jeans, baggy shirts, it was pretty much baggy everything I ever wore on my body, except for my socks and underwear of course. Being as tall as I am and as skinny as I am, I always felt that wearing baggy clothes would cover some of that up. On some level, I was rather afraid to change that. Many often suggested I should, but I was too afraid I’d look like that beanpole again I was once called constantly throughout my childhood. Even after I did an AA commitment in a jail recently, where an inmate laughed and said I was still rocking the 80’s look, I refused to change my fashion, mostly out of fear. But, after a picture was taken of me wearing some of my dress clothes, seeing how baggy it all looked on me, almost as if I had lost a bunch of weight and didn’t have any clothes that fit, I started to think that maybe indeed it might be time to change this part of me. It took two pairs of jeans ripping a few days apart, and only one pair left in a shabby state to ultimately propel me in that direction.

So, I went to Kohl’s and quickly discovered the Levis number I had worn for so long had been discontinued, probably because the style was no longer in fashion! Regardless, I proceeded to try on hundreds, yes, I do mean hundreds, of pairs of jeans from Levis, to Lee’s, to a number of other brands, until I finally came down to two styles from a company called Urban Pipeline. Ironically, one was the very same baggy look I’d been wearing for decades, while the other, well let’s just say I finally had a butt when I wore them! As I stared in the mirror switching from one to the other, over and over again, fear of change consumed me. And then quite abruptly, I looked in the mirror and said it was time to change a part of me I’d been resistant to for the majority of my life. So much had already changed within me in the past decade with all the spiritual work I’ve been doing to heal myself. Maybe it was time to honor that by changing what I wore? And so, I did. I bought the new form-fitting style, all seven colors of it, in good old OCD fashion! LOL! And you know what? I’ve actually felt a whole lot better ever since! I’ve felt more confident and have come to really accept this new look on me and so has everyone else it seems, as a number of friends have paid me compliments. I’m now starting to change out my other clothes because of it and am committed to bringing myself completely out of the 80’s and 90’s and fully into the 2020’s!

In the end, people may think my sudden fashion change is due to some mid-life crisis. But, I say that maybe I finally found the willingness to change a part of me that was once Fort Knox resistant to it, and thank God for that! Because the result of such a minor change has led to a huge increase in the amount of love and acceptance I now have for myself!

I wish to always be open and willing to change. Change that will continue to help me grow in my self-confidence and change that will help me to grow closer to the Source that lives within me and around me. 

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson