I Really Miss Those Days Of Old…

I really miss those days of old. Call it becoming old fashioned, call it being stuck in the past, call it a result of growing old, or call it whatever you want. All I know is that as I continue to navigate these difficult COVID-19 times, I find myself fondly reminiscing of all the things that once were the norm in my younger years, that are now becoming something of the past, or already have become just that, long before this pandemic even came about.

Things like when there were no phones or tablets or video consoles to constantly glance down at when eating our meals together, where instead our only choice was to be social with each other and connect much deeper from places like our heart.

Things like when one game after another was played outside until the sun finally set, where some of which never even had an official name until we gave it one. Games where we kicked a can, and ran and hid, or ones where we sought to win over some type of flag. Games that definitely brought us much closer together, as we interacted in person with each other, rather than through headsets on video consoles for hours on end.

Things like when there were regular block parties or progressive dinners at each other’s homes, where we’d get to know our neighbors so much better, instead of living on streets where we hardly know anyone, other than through an occasional wave or hello from a distance.

Things like when texting wasn’t a thing, when people totally desired to pick up the phone to hear a friendly and caring voice on the other end, where tears got shared on one side or both, instead of simply sending heart, sad face, or countless other emojis that are totally void of feeling any real connection and emotion.

Things like when our self-esteem was something we worked on within ourselves and came from a personal achievement that had nothing to do with someone else’s approval, instead of basing it upon social media, where our self-esteem comes from the number of likes we get to some posting or how many friends we achieve in connecting to an online profile.

Things like when people relied more on feeling better by helping others and doing community service, instead of relying upon drugs and medications to make it happen, like so many are starting to do these days.

Things like when happy birthday greetings were done more through personalized cards, special phone calls, and surprise visits, rather than sending a few words through a quick text message or social media posting.

Things like when people used to go on hot summer nights to places like drive-ins, roller skating rinks, and bowling alleys to interact with each other, rather than sitting at home and getting drunk and high on their front porches.

Things like when people really cared about showing their love and kindness to each other, when the desire to be more personal was a typical thing, when people liked giving warm hugs and firm handshakes, even to strangers, rather than avoiding all tokens of closeness more than not.

So yes, I find myself really missing those days of old, especially as of late, and often wonder now if this pandemic will permanently change our landscape to one where we never return to times of personal closeness with others being the norm. Closeness that emanates from the heart and soul through interpersonal connection, one that Christ himself demonstrated time and time again, even when sickness was all around him.

To truly heal our world and all this sickness within it, maybe what it needs a lot more of right now is connection, rather than disconnection, closeness rather than distance, and time spent together, rather than apart. Three things I remember quite fondly being present a lot more so in our past than our present, leaving me with far too many feelings of really missing those days of old…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Thought For The Day

Quote #1

“Altruism, the wish to be of service to others, is the best source of happiness. There is no doubt about that.” (Dalai Lama XIV)

Quote #2

“Altruism is innate, but it’s not instinctual. Everybody’s wired for it, but a switch has to be flipped.” (David Rakoff)

Quote #3

“Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness.” (Martin Luther King Jr.)

Bonus Quote

“Empathy underlies virtually everything that makes society work like trust, altruism, collaboration, love, charity. Failure to empathize is a key part of most social problems like crime, violence, war, racism, child abuse, and inequity, to name just a few. “ (Bruce D. Perry)

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Grateful Heart Monday

Well it’s the beginning of the week which of course you know then that it’s time for another Grateful Heart Monday, which for today is for this guy named Jay, someone from the rooms of 12 Step recovery, who did something during a recent meeting that truly touched my heart.

On the average, I attend somewhere between three to four 12 Step meetings a week and for the most part, rarely does anything happen anymore during them that ever end up blowing me away. After 25 years of sobriety and having attended countless meetings, it’s safe to say that it takes something pretty special to make a meeting overly memorable for me these days. But, thankfully occasionally they do still happen, like they did during my last home group’s meeting.

When that meeting began, I raised my hand first to share. I talked about how difficult a time I’ve been having navigating this COVID-19 world where signs of affection have become far and few between. I mentioned how prior to this pandemic, I always looked forward to the many hugs I received and how loved I consistently felt in every room of recovery I attended. But ever since this virus got unleashed upon our world, I’ve felt more and more alone with each day that has passed and have grown so weary of all those elbow and fist bumps, and people keeping their distance from each other. For as much as I know the importance of and reasons behind social distancing, it’s caused me such great angst that I’ve fallen into depression and great loneliness. I went on to mention after that how I’ve still done my very best to keep putting myself out there to help the next suffering person, but how that hasn’t taken any of those feelings of depression and loneliness away. I watched as many heads nodded in agreement, letting me know I wasn’t alone in how I was feeling. I ended by saying that sometimes I really just need a hug to know I’m still loved in this crazy world, especially as our world continues to become more and more distant from each other.

When the next person began to share, a guy by the name of Jay, I was totally on the verge of tears from what I had just opened up about. I had made myself feel so extremely vulnerable during my brief moments of speaking that I had become fully overwhelmed in emotion. As Jay began to speak, he suddenly stopped and looked at me, and said that before he proceeded any further, he wanted to give me a hug because he knew I needed it and wasn’t afraid, pandemic and all.

So, as all the others in attendance sat there in silence, Jay got up, walked over to me, and gave me the warmest and most genuine hug I’ve probably received during this entire pandemic thus far. It was so warm and genuine and so much from the heart and soul, that I could feel God’s love emanating from him. Such a small blip in my day truly ended up having such an incredibly huge impact upon my life right then. Why? Because Jay did what I felt Christ would have done, even in the midst of a crazy virus and all the fears surrounding it. He trusted the Spirit enough to not be afraid of crossing those socially distant boundaries and gave me the very thing God knew I needed oh, so, very bad.

I am so grateful for that hug, for Jay, and for all those out there like him, who even in the midst of this pandemic, continue to offer their tokens of affection to others, because like Christ taught long ago, unconditional acts of love conquers all, even social distancing and even a virus.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson