Month: May 2018

Silly Joke Friday

Silly Joke #1

A woman has twins, gives them up for adoption. One goes to an Egyptian family and is named “Ahmal.” The other is sent to a Spanish family and is name “Juan.” Years later, Juan sends his birth mother a picture of himself. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. He replies, “They’re identical twins for Pete sake!! If you’ve seen Juan, you’ve seen Ahmal!!”

Silly Joke #2

Teacher: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
Maria: Here it is.
Teacher: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
Class: Maria.

Silly Joke #3

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary clinic. As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, “I’m sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away.”

The distressed owner wailed, “Are you sure?”
“Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead,” he replied.
“How can you be so sure?” she protested. “I mean, you haven’t done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something.”

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room, and returned a few moments later with a black Labrador retriever. As the duck’s owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog and took it out, and returned a few moments later with a cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed delicately at the bird. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, “I’m sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck.”

Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys, and produced a bill which he handed to the woman.

The duck’s owner, still in shock, took the bill. “$150!” she cried. “$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!”

The vet shrugged. “I’m sorry. If you’d taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the lab work and the cat scan, it’s now $150.”

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Daily Reflection

“God is not punishing you. God is preparing you. Trust God’s plans, not your pain.” (Artsy Christian)

When I came across today’s quote, I knew instantly I wanted to write a daily reflection about it, simply because I’ve struggled for years now wondering at times if I’m being punished by God for all my past transgressions, as I know there have been a lot of them in this life alone. Yet, somehow, I find myself constantly returning to the belief that maybe it’s just human beings who have labeled God as this wrathful punisher of people, as doesn’t that judgment always seem to come at the precise moments in our lives when things aren’t going the way our ego wants and desires?

So, if that’s not the case, and God really isn’t a punishing God, then why does God allow such difficult pain and suffering to occur for many of us in our lives? Could it be solely to help prepare us for some greater plan that is beyond our understanding? Is it possible that our pain and suffering is simply a level of discipline that Jesus once talked about, that becomes truly necessary to help us reach our highest potential in life? I know that’s a hard concept to swallow and believe me when I saw that my ego often fights this very notion, especially when I’m going through a stream of days, weeks, months, and even years where my mind and body writhes in agony more than not.

But, there is something quite good that’s actually come out of all this pain and suffering that probably wouldn’t have happened if I never had to face any of my health issues in the first place. You see, it’s all this pain and suffering that’s driven me to rid myself of every bit of hate, anger, negativity, and judgment that once consumed the majority of my life. And the more I’ve done that, the more I seem to cultivate higher and higher levels of compassion, unconditional love, acceptance, and forgiveness of others, which are four things I never had much of before all my pain and suffering began.

Thus, to put it rather bluntly, I’m leaning more and more these days to believe that God is like a loving parent who disciplines their child, solely to protect them from going down paths that will only lead to more pain and suffering and away from them ever reaching their highest potential. Sure, many of us often fight that discipline whenever it feels present and instead choose to take our free will somewhere else. But, honestly, where has that ever gotten you? For me, fighting the discipline has usually just led to an even deeper pit of despair filled with an even greater level of pain and suffering.

That’s why I’m opting to place my hope and faith more so nowadays in the idea that God is actually preparing me for something greater through all this pain and suffering, rather than believing it’s simply a punishment for all my past transgressions. As given the growing level of connection I feel in my heart today to everyone and everything, I ultimately am seeing more good coming out of this discipline than not. And frankly, I would gladly rather remain on this path, than go back to any day before all this pain and suffering began, where my life was engulfed in far too much negative energy and darkness.

Dear God, if I’m ever wrong, please correct me. If I’m ever lost, please guide me. And if I ever start to give up, especially on You, please help me to keep going and to keep trusting in You.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson