Silly Joke #1
A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, ‘Why in the heck would you ever name your dogs that? ‘HELLLOOOOOOO……,’ answered the blonde. ‘They’re watch dogs’!
Silly Joke #2
The graduate with a science degree asks, ‘Why does it work?’
The graduate with an engineering degree asks, ‘How does it work?’
The graduate with an accounting degree asks, ‘How much will it cost?’
The graduate with a liberal arts degree asks, ‘Do you want fries with that?’
Silly Joke #3
A guy goes into a bar. He’s sitting on the stool, enjoying his drink when he hears, “You look great!” He looks around – there’s nobody near him. He hears the voice again, “No really, you look terrific.” The guy looks around again. Nobody. He hears, “Is that a new shirt or something? Because you are absolutely glowing!” He then realizes that the voice is coming from a dish of nuts on the bar. “Hey,” the guy calls to the bartender, “What’s with these nuts?” “Oh,” the bartender answers, “They’re complimentary.”
Bonus Silly Joke (For Adults)
An old retired single sailor puts on his old uniform and decides to go down to the docks for old times sake to hire a prostitute. After finding one, he takes her to his home and gives it his best for a guy his age. After a couple of minutes he asks, “How am I doing?” The prostitute replies, “Well sailor, you’re doing about three knots.” “Three knots?” He asks. “What’s that supposed to mean?” She says, “Well, you’re knot hard, you’re knot in and you’re knot getting your money back.”
Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson
