Month: February 2014

Being Grateful For The Music That Moves Our Soul

Have you ever suddenly heard a song somewhere for the first time and felt your heart move in some way as you listened to it?

They say that music can move the soul, and well the truth is that it does sometimes. But I’m also sure that it’s a completely different experience for each and every individual, as based upon what a person is going through at the time of hearing it. I had my own personal soul experience with this very thing when I heard the song “Happy” by Pharrell Williams for the first time recently.

“Happy” is one of those songs that really sticks in your head long after it finishes. Its tune is catchy and its chorus is even catchier. When I first heard it play, I got this tingly sensation all over my body, which I like to refer to as my “God bumps” when it happens. Putting it more simply, what I felt inside as I listened to this song was being uplifted, which lasted well beyond the song’s running time.

What’s ironic about the song “Happy” is that I should have heard it last summer when I went to the movie theater and saw Despicable Me 2, given that it was one of its original tracks. But I didn’t, or maybe I just wasn’t in a place at the time to be open to hearing it’s positive message. What I do remember back then though was sitting in the theater watching the movie and struggling to laugh at any of the humor in it because of the level of physical pain I was enduring. I’m sure this is why I can’t remember when this song played at any point during the film, but I know it did.

Thankfully, things are vastly different in my life today as compared to last summer when “Happy” was first released. My life is much better now on many levels, which I know has to do with my closer relationship that I have with God today. Maybe that’s why this song couldn’t impact me last summer because I wasn’t as far along in my spiritual quest as I am now. Either way, I have listened to Pharrell’s song quite a bit these past few days because it puts a smile on my face and stirs my heart with joy every time I listen to it.

I’m grateful for when music can do that for me, especially when it creates those feelings of joy and happiness within. I take this as a positive sign to all the spiritual growth and healing I’ve been going through, because there once was a time where every song I heard made me cry.

So if you haven’t listened to this song yet, then I hope you may click the link I included to it below. Who knows, maybe you might find yourself being uplifted by it like I was. Regardless, I believe that we all should be grateful for the music that does move our soul, as it’s just one more way that God is communicating to us, on any given day…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y6Sxv-sUYtM

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

 

Only Willing To Go To Convenient Lengths?

One of the oldest sayings an individual often hears in any 12 Step program says that a person must be willing to go to any length to get recovery from their addiction. Unfortunately, that frequently ends up not being the case for far too many of the people who hear it. Instead, what generally happens to them is that they’re only willing to go to convenient lengths to get it.

Before I provide some examples of what those convenient lengths look like in recovery, it’s probably best to explain something first. When a person such as myself is actively addicted to anything, there’s no obstacle that ever gets in my way to acquiring it. I can remember countless blizzards and other treacherous weather conditions where I went out looking for alcohol and drug fixes. I also can remember going into the wee hours of many mornings on my computer ignoring my need for sleep, while looking at one pornographic image or video after another. And I can even remember those times when my bills were piling up and yet I was spending dollar after dollar gambling, shopping, or going on vacations.

For whatever the reason, many don’t follow the same drive once they find recovery. Instead, they cut corners like I once did. Here are some examples of what that looks like:

1. People told me to pray on my knees and get humble every morning and night in recovery. I always started out that way until I began making excuses to myself as to why I didn’t have to do that. I’d tell myself that it wasn’t written anywhere requiring me to do that. I’d say I was too tired, or too much in pain, or I’d find some other trivial excuse. Eventually, all of those excuses led me to forgetting to pray or just choosing to not pray at all.

2. People told me to get to recovery meetings as often as I could. I always started out attending at least one each day. But as time moved forward, attending seven of those a week became more like one a week. That’s only because I began making those same excuses to myself saying I was too tired, too much in pain, or of all things, even blaming the weather or some other lame excuse that would never have stopped me in the past from acquiring some addiction fix.

3. People told me to keep my phone off during recovery meetings and pay attention. I always started out that way until I began making everything else more important in my life than to who was actually speaking at each of those meetings. I became more concerned with texting someone I felt I had to text or e-mailing a person I felt I had to e-mail. Eventually that led to me using meeting times to surf the web on my phone.

4. People told me to call my sponsor in recovery each and every day to check in, even if it was just for a minute or two. Early on I did that until I allowed my life to start consuming me. It’s then that I became too busy or too involved with things and quickly placed those phone check-ins as an optional task in life. Being too tired or feeling sick were common excuses here too. Eventually I would stop calling my sponsor pretty much altogether.

I could go on and on and on with the amount of things that were suggested of me in all of my recovery programs that I continuously let slide to the wayside. In every case, it was always due to the same thing. I was only willing to go to convenient lengths in my recovery, unlike how I was in my quest to get that addiction fix of any sort.

If you want those promises to come true that are read in just about ever type of recovery meeting for any addiction, then you really need to know just one thing. You MUST be willing to go to ANY length to get full recovery. Convenient lengths will get you only a convenient recovery. And that convenient recovery will last for only so long before you’re back out seeking your addiction again. I should know as it took me close to sixteen years of time in sobriety to figure that out.

So take it from a guy like me who banged my head against the wall more times than I can count. Being only willing to go to convenient lengths and making those excuses to avoid those simple suggestions did nothing more for me than lead me back down a dead-end addiction-prone path. The only way I ever found full recovery from all addictions and a strong relationship to my Higher Power (God), was to become willing to go to any lengths to get it. Hopefully now, you’ll be more willing to go to ANY length to get it for yourself…

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

A Prayer For Loving Yourself Unconditionally

Yesterday’s entry was a mantra that was geared towards helping a person develop a much greater love for themselves. If you had trouble saying it, or if you didn’t even try doing it at all, then know you’re not alone. It took me a long time to get into the practice of saying that mantra because I once had so much dislike for myself. To get there, one of the things I had to do was pray to God about it. For this reason, I have included a prayer today that can help guide you to being able to say that mantra and getting on the path to a much greater self-love.

“Dear God, I want to love myself unconditionally but I don’t know how to. There are parts of my life that I really don’t like and I’m not sure how to get beyond those things. Will you please help me to heal all those parts of me that keep me from having a much greater love for myself? I’m truly tired of beating myself up and avoiding looking at myself in the mirror. I ask that You help me become open to doing whatever I need to do so that I may one day love myself unconditionally like I know You do of me. Thank You God for hearing my prayer today. Amen.”

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson