I’m An ENFJ, What Are You?

Have you ever done a Myers-Briggs assessment or some other type of personality test? The first time I ever completed one of them was back in my high school days, which seems like eons ago now. While I never put much thought into the four-letter result I received from doing it back then, I am now, but more on that in a minute.

I’m sure there are many who would probably say that personality tests don’t truly depict an individual accurately. For years I was definitely one of them. Answering a brief set of questions that took no more than 15 to 20 minutes and then getting a four-letter result that summarized my entire personality in a nutshell always seemed hard for me to believe in its validity. But that opinion totally shifted tonight when a little boredom drove me to complete several different versions of these tests online with each having their own unique set of questions. Ironically, the four-letter result I received in each case was the same as the one I originally got from that first personality test I took back in high school.

For those who don’t know what I mean by this four-letter result here’s how’s it’s broken down in any of these personality test results:

1st letter is either E (Extraversion) or I (Introversion)

2nd letter is either S (Sensing) or N (Intuition)

3rd letter is either T (Thinking) or F (Feeling)

4th letter is either J (Judgment) or P (Perception)

The four-letter combination I’ve received each and every time I’ve taken one of these personality tests has consistently been “ENJF”. What I find most fascinating by this is how much I really thought my personality has morphed quite a bit over the past few decades given the amount of things I’ve been through, as well as the spiritual growth I’ve undergone. But after reading the detailed description of an ENJF, I found it hard to refute.

I honestly don’t think it’s a bad thing though that I’ve gotten the same four-letter result time and time again from taking these personality tests. I guess it just stands to reason that maybe we do hold onto to a core set of personality traits our entire life no matter what the major life events we each may go through.

Regardless, I had fun re-taking these tests so I’ve included a few of the links for you to do the same if it possibly interests you. I’ve also included a full detailed description of what an ENFJ is if you want to know a little more about who I am inside, and just so you know, it does fit me to a T. Lastly, I decided it really doesn’t matter to me whether my four-letter personality test result ever changes in this lifetime or not. I think what’s truly important is that I continue to fully embrace who I am more and more everyday.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

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The links to a few personality tests:

http://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp

http://www.41q.com

A link to each of the 16 different personality descriptions:

http://www.personalitypage.com/html/portraits.html

The detailed description for an ENFJ:

As an ENFJ, you’re primary mode of living is focused externally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system. Your secondary mode is internal, where you take things in primarily via your intuition.

ENFJs are people-focused individuals. They live in the world of people possibilities. More so than any other type, they have excellent people skills. They understand and care about people, and have a special talent for bringing out the best in others. ENFJ’s main interest in life is giving love, support, and a good time to other people. They are focused on understanding, supporting, and encouraging others. They make things happen for people, and get their best personal satisfaction from this.

Because ENFJ’s people skills are so extraordinary, they have the ability to make people do exactly what they want them to do. They get under people’s skins and get the reactions that they are seeking. ENFJ’s motives are usually unselfish, but ENFJs who have developed less than ideally have been known to use their power over people to manipulate them.

ENFJ’s are so externally focused that it’s especially important for them to spend time alone. This can be difficult for some ENFJs, because they have the tendency to be hard on themselves and turn to dark thoughts when alone. Consequently, ENFJs might avoid being alone, and fill their lives with activities involving other people. ENFJs tend to define their life’s direction and priorities according to other people’s needs, and may not be aware of their own needs. It’s natural to their personality type that they will tend to place other people’s needs above their own, but they need to stay aware of their own needs so that they don’t sacrifice themselves in their drive to help others.

ENFJ’s tend to be more reserved about exposing themselves than other extraverted types. Although they may have strongly-felt beliefs, they’re likely to refrain from expressing them if doing so would interfere with bringing out the best in others. Because their strongest interest lies in being a catalyst of change in other people, they’re likely to interact with others on their own level, in a chameleon-like manner, rather than as individuals.

Which is not to say that the ENFJ does not have opinions. ENFJs have definite values and opinions, which they’re able to express clearly and succinctly. These beliefs will be expressed as long as they’re not too personal. ENFJ is in many ways expressive and open, but is more focused on being responsive and supportive of others. When faced with a conflict between a strongly held value and serving another person’s need, they are highly likely to value the other person’s needs.

The ENFJ may feel quite lonely even when surrounded by people. This feeling of aloneness may be exacerbated by the tendency to not reveal their true selves.

People love ENFJs. They are fun to be with, and truly understand and love people. They are typically very straightforward and honest. Usually ENFJs exude a lot of self-confidence, and have a great amount of ability to do many different things. They are generally bright, full of potential, energetic and fast-paced. They are usually good at anything, which captures their interest.

ENFJs like for things to be well organized, and will work hard at maintaining structure and resolving ambiguity. They have a tendency to be fussy, especially with their home environments.

In the work place, ENFJs do well in positions where they deal with people. They are naturals for the social committee. Their uncanny ability to understand people and say just what needs to be said to make them happy makes them naturals for counseling. They enjoy being the center of attention, and do very well in situations where they can inspire and lead others, such as teaching.

ENFJs do not like dealing with impersonal reasoning. They don’t understand or appreciate its merit, and will be unhappy in situations where they’re forced to deal with logic and facts without any connection to a human element. Living in the world of people possibilities, they enjoy their plans more than their achievements. They get excited about possibilities for the future, but may become easily bored and restless with the present.

ENFJs have a special gift with people, and are basically happy people when they can use that gift to help others. They get their best satisfaction from serving others. Their genuine interest in Humankind and their exceptional intuitive awareness of people makes them able to draw out even the most reserved individuals.

ENFJs have a strong need for close, intimate relationships, and will put forth a lot of effort in creating and maintaining these relationships. They’re very loyal and trustworthy once involved in a relationship.

An ENFJ who has not developed their Feeling side may have difficulty making good decisions, and may rely heavily on other people in decision-making processes. If they have not developed their Intuition, they may not be able to see possibilities, and will judge things too quickly based on established value systems or social rules, without really understanding the current situation. An ENFJ who has not found their place in the world is likely to be extremely sensitive to criticism, and to have the tendency to worry excessively and feel guilty. They are also likely to be very manipulative and controlling with others.

In general, ENFJs are charming, warm, gracious, creative and diverse individuals with richly developed insights into what makes other people tick. This special ability to see growth potential in others combined with a genuine drive to help people makes the ENFJ a truly valued individual. As giving and caring as the ENFJ is, they need to remember to value their own needs as well as the needs of others.

I Wish I Was Barry Allen, AKA The Flash

If you had to live in a television show as the lead character for the rest of your life, which one would it be? As you can see by today’s title, I wish I was Barry Allen, aka The Flash, which is a show currently airing weekly on the CW.

For those who aren’t superhero nuts like myself, Barry Allen was an average guy living an average life as a police chemist doing what he could to help fight crime. But one night he’s suddenly struck by lightning, which also shatters various vials of chemicals he’s working with all over him. After awaking from a coma, Allen becomes fully imbued with the power to move at nearly the speed of light. In time, he also discovers he has the ability to pass through objects and phase into other dimensions as well.

Why I’d choose to be Barry Allen in this CW TV show is how much the lead character has qualities that remind me so much of myself. In it, Barry, who’s played by actor Grant Gustin, is somewhat of a nerdy loner with a sarcastic and witty side to himself. That’s pretty close to how I see myself today and how I mostly was during my teenage years. But the trait I’ve always admired the most about Barry Allen is the same I liked with how the comic books originally portrayed him. Barry’s truest inner desire was always to be a hero and help others, which becomes totally apparent once he gains his superpower.

I’m not really sure why I’ve always gravitated the most towards The Flash though given the rest of the team he eventually becomes a part of, that being the Justice League. After all, his teammates include Green Lantern, Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, Martian Manhunter, and Aquaman, all of which are much stronger and endowed with more than just a single ability. Maybe that’s why though because just like I was when growing up, Barry Allen was that average skinny geek who was regularly picked on and bullied and never fast enough to get away from any of it. But when he gains the ability to run even faster than Superman, he doesn’t run away from any of that danger anymore. Instead, he runs right towards it finding plenty of ways to utilize his gift to help protect the greater good of mankind.

By far, I find this CW series to be the most accurate I’ve ever seen a comic book hero portrayed. For years I waited to see something like this manifest for my favorite fictional character and thankfully, it’s finally here. I really wish there was a way for me to magically transport myself into this series and live as Barry Allen. Alas, I’m pretty sure there’s not so I guess I’ll have to settle for living vicariously through watching actor Grant Gustin on my television screen each week. And in the meantime, while I continue to enjoy watching this new series, I patiently await the development of my own unique spiritual superpowers, as I’m totally convinced we all have them lying dormant within us, waiting to emerge when the time is right, solely for the sake of being a guardian of the Light.

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson

What A Life Of Self-Reliance Got Me…

I used to be fully convinced I could do it. I had honestly believed my path to a life of peace and serenity was going to be achieved through nothing more than self-reliance. But when that path led me into a dead-end with a suicide attempt, it was then I realized just how wrong I was. Thankfully, what I rely the most upon today is my Higher Power, except to get there took a whole heck of a lot of pain and hardship.

I really think most human beings are stubborn by nature. Aren’t the majority of us initially full of so much pride and ego that we often convince ourselves we can get through anything on our own, no matter how difficult it seems to be. Well I know I once did and that path began with me deciding in 1995 that I didn’t need any type of 12 Step program to recover from my alcoholism and drug addiction. Instead, I chose to forge my own path of sobriety, one that felt more than not like I was always fighting a lot of fires. For a good while I was quite successful in doing it too and each time I did, I merely patted myself on the back and continued to foster the belief that I all I needed to make it through life was myself. But in 2007, when my long-term relationship completely collapsed and ended for good, I saw the first chink appear in my prideful armor I had constructed out of self-reliance.

Life then became like a domino effect for me after that. After the fall of that relationship came the demise of my business. And after the demise of my business came the collapse of my financial stability. And after the collapse of my financial stability came the downfall of my health. And after the downfall of my health came a five-day stint in the mental ward of a psychiatric hospital. And finally after that five-day stint in the mental ward of a psychiatric hospital, came that eventual attempt at suicide in the fall of 2011. It was then that I knew a life of self-reliance was never going to work. I was so thoroughly miserable, angry, and resentful at that point in time that I knew the only thing I could do was fully seek something greater than myself because I had already tried everything else.

Since the spring of 2012, I have been doing my best to rely upon the Higher Power I found in working the 12 Steps. It hasn’t been easy for me though to maintain this practice on any level solely because I lived with self-reliance for so long. But I have to say there’s far less fires having to be put out in my life these days. And even when there has been one because I went back to a little bit of self-reliance, it’s rarely required anything more than a watering can to be put out. That’s a far cry from the days when a life of self-reliance led to multiple five-alarm fires.

The bottom line is that any life run on self-reliance is only ever going to lead someone to fighting one fire after another. While they may be successful for a time in putting each of them out all on their own, eventually some will get so out of control it will get them seriously burned in the process. And when a person sustains enough of those serious burns, it’s then and only then will they realize that self-reliance failed them. And it’s then they hopefully will seek something greater than themselves to run their life instead…

Peace, love, light, and joy,

Andrew Arthur Dawson