Grateful Heart Monday

Welcome to another Grateful Heart Monday where I continue to start each week off with a slice of gratitude from my life, which for today is for something a close friend of mine said to me recently about a certain trait of mine, one that only developed because of all my 12-step recovery work.

Before I mention what that trait is that my friend said he appreciated so much and touched my heart, leading to this very piece of gratitude, it’s important to note that I once was a very untrustworthy person, who gossiped incredibly, and always got mad when people didn’t open up to me, never once looking in the mirror as to why they weren’t.

Considering that, a few weeks ago as I dropped my friend Lee off at the airport after his visit and had just given him a hug goodbye, he told me that while he wasn’t the type of person to ever really open up to people, he felt safe and comfortable doing so with me and that I was a person he believed he could talk to about anything, which said a lot for a guy like him, who truly is more of a listener in life than a sharer.

When I think back to all my active days of addiction, I never would have heard those words from anyone. Because most people saw how I went from person to person sharing things originally said out of confidence to me. Sometimes those private things made their way back to the person who shared them in confidence with me and even then, I’d make excuses, saying something like “I didn’t know it wasn’t meant be shared” rather than owning my character defect and doing the work to change that toxic part of myself.

If there is one thing that I know about myself today, it’s that I’m not that person anymore. Rather, I am a trustworthy person. I have had many people over the past decade during these hardcore years of recovery work share very deep things with me because they’ve seen my 12-Step dedication to being a spiritually healthier person. I’ve become a repository of sorts now of people telling me one thing after another that they wouldn’t ever tell another living soul. Sometimes it’s hard to hear some of those things, but I give gratitude to God for being a person now that people can come to and open up with about things they probably wouldn’t ever do with any other individual.

So, I’m grateful today on this Grateful Heart Monday, for Lee reminding me of that. I’m thankful to be far more of a trustworthy individual nowadays and that I occasionally have people like Lee who remind me of this, as it truly does show that 12 Step recovery works.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Question For The Day

Today’s question is…

If you were to leave a random simple message on a “kindness” board you just came across at a dining establishment you were in, what would it say?

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson


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God’s Mysterious Ways

Thank you for joining in for another entry of my series, God’s Mysterious Ways, where I write about things that may be more than just coincidences, where God may very well indeed have a hand behind it, which for today is about a random post-it note that was stuck to the floor at a Starbucks I went to recently.

In the last month or so at all the Starbucks I’ve been to, there has been a board of sorts near the front of each store with colorful pens and sticky notes below it to write out something one appreciates in life, is grateful about, or a gesture of general kindness for others. I’ve occasionally glanced at each of these boards, but never have I added any post-it note of my own. That’s only because each of them are usually so inundated with tons of messages already on them with sticky-note upon sticky-note, that the notes themselves become invisible to me, leaving me uninterested in the feel-good campaign. For the most part though, on those occasional glances to those boards, I’ve noticed a few generic messages like “Blessed” or “Have a beautiful life” or “I love my partner” and things of that sort, none of which have ever left me feeling moved at all. That was until a few weeks ago when I entered one of the local Starbucks in Toledo.

I was approaching the register feeling extremely blue, questioning like I do on most days lately whether God is ever going to deliver me from my chronic pain, when I glanced down on the ground for whatever the reason and saw one of those sticky-notes affixed to the floor all by itself. I found it odd and due to my OCD, I also found it annoying that it was there on the clean floor. So, I picked it up and was going to place it back on the board somewhere. But, when I picked it up, I noticed its message, one that has most definitely has stuck with me ever since. It said, “God Never Fails.”

Of course, my initial thoughts went to questions like why that post-it note was there in the first place and how long had it been there. After two days of thinking about this way too much, I brought it up to my therapist and as I spoke about it, I finally got into my heart and teared up. Because at my essence, I do believe God indeed never fails, and isn’t going to fail me with the long-endured healing process I undertook so long ago now.

While this may not have been the burning bush my ego often wishes for, it was a message that hit my heart in all its simplicity and something I felt warranted another entry in God’s Mysterious Ways.

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson