Silly Joke Friday

Silly Joke #1

One Sunday morning the pastor noticed little Johnny was standing staring up at the large plaque that hung in the foyer of the church. The youngest of seven had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up and stood beside him and gazing up at the plaque he said quietly, “Good morning son.” “Good morning Mr. Pastor” replied Little Johnny not taking his eyes off the plaque. “Sir, what is this?” he asked. “Well son, these are all the people who have died in the service”, replied the pastor. Soberly, they stood together staring up at the large plaque. Little Johnny’s voice barely broke the silence when he asked quietly, “Which one sir, the 8:30 or the 10:30, because I usually go to your 10:30?!”

Silly Joke #2

A 92 year-old man that was hard of hearing went to the Doctor to get a physical. A few days later the Doctor saw the man walking down the street with a gorgeous young lady on his arm. A couple of days later the Doctor talked to the man and said, “You’re really doing great, aren’t you?” The man replied, “Just doing what you said Doctor, ‘Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.” The Doctor said, “Actually, I didn’t say that. I said you got a heart murmur. Be careful!”

Silly Joke #3

A young American tourist goes on a self-guided tour of a creepy old European castle. Near the end of her tour, she sees a young girl looking around in the last room she’s looking in who asks her how she enjoyed her visit. The tourist admitted to being a bit worried about seeing a ghost in some of the dark cobwebby rooms and passages. “Oh, don’t worry,” says the young girl, “I’ve never seen a ghost all the time I’ve been here.” “How long is that?” asks the tourist. “About three hundred years…”

Bonus Silly Joke

Last summer blonde Ed met a woman while on vacation and fell head over heels in love with her. On the last night of his vacation, the two of them went to dinner and had a serious talk about how they would continue the relationship. “It’s only fair to warn you, I’m a total golf nut,” Blonde Ed said to his lady friend. “I eat, sleep and breathe golf, so if that’s a problem, you’d better say so now.” “Well, if we’re being honest with each other, here goes,” she replied. “I’m really a hooker.” “I see,” Blonde Ed replied, and was quiet for a moment. Then he added, “Well, you know, it’s probably because you’re not keeping your wrists straight when you hit the ball.”

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

Thought For The Day

Today’s quotes all surround a subject I wrote about in yesterday’s blog entry how none of us are perfect in this world, how we all have our own flaws, imperfections, vulnerabilities, and insecurities. I felt this batch of quotes were quite inspiring on this subject.

“Do you hate it when people make a joke about you, about something you are actually incredibly insecure about and they don’t realize it, but every laugh feels like a stab in your chest, because it hurts so much and brings up memories you’d rather forget. But you can’t say anything, because then people would know your weaknesses. They’d know how insecure you really are. So instead you just laugh it off, and hide the pain you feel inside.” (Anonymous)

“I have insecurities, of course. But I don’t hang out with anyone who points them out to me.” (Adele)

“I used to tell myself I had to be perfect and then things would fall into place, but only now do I realize that is far from the case. I am imperfectly perfect, I’m accepting all my flaws. I’m no longer letting my insecurities put my life on pause.” (Monica Carolan)

“Nobody is perfect. I just don’t believe in perfection. But I do believe in saying, ‘This is who I am and look at me not being perfect!’ I’m proud of that.” (Kate Winslet)

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson

What Are Your Insecurities?

I often feel like far too many people walk around claiming not to be insecure about anything in their lives. I tend to believe the reason for that is it makes them feel weak and vulnerable to the world around them if they openly admitted they had any insecurities. But truly, I think everyone, and yes, I do mean EVERYONE, has some sort of insecurity or insecurities in their lives. While some genuinely might be completely oblivious of them, I find most just do a pretty darn good job covering them up by always pointing out the insecurities in those around them, that they themselves battle within.

There are many insecurities I have seen in plenty of individuals over the years, mostly because I have dealt with the very same insecurities myself. Spending as much time as I have in so many different types of support groups, therapies, retreats, and the like over the years has totally helped me to “truly spot in others what I got”. Some of the top insecurities I’ve witnessed the most in this world deal with one’s appearance, finances, social standing and status in society, relationship status, sexuality, and health.

While most probably rarely consciously choose to ever talk openly about any of their insecurities with the world in general, such as on their social media, I decided to do that very thing today by sharing a list of my insecurities in this blog entry. Because I’m not perfect and I do have my own flaws and shortcomings, just as each of us do. We may do our best to tell the world we don’t have them, but deep down there’s always that part of us that knows otherwise. The more I’ve tried to deny this, the more I find myself living in ego, falling back into some sort of an addiction, and growing farther away from being the unconditionally loving being I want to be in this life.

So, am I doing this exercise for some sort of therapeutic reason? Partially. But ultimately, I’m doing this simply because I want to be more of an honest, vulnerable, and transparent individual in this world that people can relate to, because deep down we really all do have our set of insecurities. We just may not talk about them openly with each other. So here goes. This is the true fully transparent me…

  • I am insecure about my lack of employment and income.
  • I am insecure about my weight and my looks in general.
  • I am insecure about ever saying or doing anything that might offend or hurt another.
  • I am insecure about the many health issues I continue to endure with no end in sight.
  • I am insecure about dying a nobody and being easily forgotten.
  • I am insecure about being alone in this world.
  • I am insecure about what my closest friends, family, and loved ones think about me.
  • I am insecure about whether I’ll ever feel truly happy, joyful, and at peace in this life.
  • I am insecure about ever following in my father’s footsteps who took his own life.
  • I am insecure about ever expressing my sexuality openly.
  • I am insecure about God’s existence and whether I’m even doing God’s will.

And I will end with this. There is one thing I am absolutely secure in and that is I always do my best everyday to be an unconditionally loving, caring, and kind individual, something that only came about by becoming as open and transparent as I’ve become in my life, insecurities and all…

Peace, love, light, and joy,
Andrew Arthur Dawson